Update on Life

Well lots has happened so I thought I would update all that care!!! This past week was supposed to be my last full time week as the lead infant teacher but of course what happened my kids were sick!! Jordan and Mariana had sinus infections Jordan had pink eye and Sam had Bronchitis (SP?) Then I woke up on Wed to Sam and Mariana having Pink Eye!!! So all that to say I went in on Friday being my last day as the lead infant teacher! I am now Part time and I have two weeks off!!
So if you want to get together with me for coffee or a playdate call me because I will be free!! I am very excited to be able to have a break from the hustle and bustle of working full time! I found out that all my health problems are from nothing other than Sleep Deprivation!! I get anywhere from 1 hour to 5 hours a night so hopefully that will change!
Oh and Praise God this Christmas will be very relaxing! We only have two places to go to on Christmas Eve and then to Church at 9 pm and then only 1 thats right 1 place on Christmas Day! That has never ever happened in my lifetime!! We are so excite to be able to just relax and enjoy our children. We are very excited because this year the girls really understand what is happening and this is Sam's First Christmas!
So Merry Christmas Everyone!!!!!

Movie

The movie is Diary of a Mad Black Woman. I love it so much that I have seen it at least 5 times. Everytime I see this movie I get something different out of it. There are some really tough scenes that are really hard to get through but I never regret it at the end of the movie. This movie has over and over again reminded me of what God means when he says to forgive no matter what! You ask what does this movie have to do with that? Watch it I promise you, you will be changed. There is a character in the movie that says if you run into someone who has hurt you (that you thought you have forgiven )and you want to get even you have not forgiven them but if you are able to feel nothing you have forgiven them. I used to be the person that wanted to get even. It could be by my actions or by my words like gossipying about you so I looked better! This is something that over the last couple of years God has shown me how to forgive. In my own life I have had to forgive someone over and over again and over and over again (no need to mention names) This was so painful for me becuase I just wanted to get even with them. I have had to walk through this and honestly it has only been God and some select Godly women that have helped me along the way. I am no longer the mad black woman like in the movie but I know that the only way that I can expect God to forgive me is to forgive others. God does not tell me everytime I go to him about that same sin no I will not forgive you he just does and forgets so who am I to say that anyone esle is different??? I can not believe that everytime I watch this movie that it reminds me of the pain that I walked through and the last half hour of the movie takes place in the church and the choir sings this beautiful song that brings me to tears everytime and reminds me why I went through what I did and how awesome God is that he brought me through it WHOLE!!!!

The Holidays............

Well I know that this may surprise you all but the holidays are not my favorite! Since my faith started deepening I began to see the meaning behind "the holidays" but still it is hard. I am stressed around this time I always have been my whole life ask my mom LOL! I get stressed about going to fiffty million parties and having no time to myself, putting on a smile like all is well to people that I see once a year and forget my name (I am not mad because I forget theirs). Now that I have kids it involves packing them extra clothes,diapers,food,PJs,toys,and anything else that they sneak into the car only to drag them around from house to house half alseep to open more and more gifts. I know that I should feel blessed that we have family to visit but 6 houses that is a lot! I am trying this year to realize the true meaning of the holidays and be thankful for God's Son be born. This year I am putting my foot down and only going to 5 houses this year and believe me that is a huge step because I am a people pleeeeezer and for me to say no to that one person is going to cause DRAMA!!
Oh and by the way I know that everyone is different when it comes to Santa but we tell our girls that Santa is fun to talk about and read about like it is to read and talk about Cinderella but that Mommy and Daddy are the ones who bring presents! We still go see Santa and take the pictures but the girls know the truth (This is our way don't hate if you don't agree) Well we have not run into any problems with this until TODAY! Jordan told her WHOLE class and teacher that Santa is not real!!! LOL!!! What do I do now!!!

Happy Thanksgiving

I am so thankful for so many things and this might be my longest blog yet!!!
1.) I am thankful for God that he gave his Son for my sins~ When I think of that I am in awe for me the one who really did all those things in the past and things I do in the present he forgives and forgives and extends grace to me every single day! I love that God meets me right where I am everyday and without him I would have nothing much love!!!!
2.) For my husband and marriage I can not believe that it will be 10 years together! God has truly blessed us and changed us. For those that do not know this time last year I was pregnant and we were seperated (one of the hardest months of my life)! God has truly healed our marriage we are a walking testimony of what having Christ in the center of your marriage does. We are not perfect and never claim to be and it is work everyday but I wake up loving my husband everyday with all of my heart Love you babe!!
3.) My children I am so thankful for I love my babies!!! I can not believe that my first baby is having her 6th Thanksgiving while my little baby is having his first!!! God has used my kids to change and heal me as well. Jordan he used to change my life, Mariana he used to bring me to my knees when she was a 3 pound baby in the NICU, and Sammy he has used to bring Nathan and I to what a marriage should be.
4.) I am thankful for my big HUGE Italian (scott,dutch,english,german,french thats the other side) Family!! Love them all when I say we are a close family it is true I mean cousins second cousins aunts uncles and greats all of us are so close and the love that we have for eachother is amazing!! My Nana and Papa are the worlds greatest grandparents on the face of this earth and I am entirely grateful that my children get to experience their love. My sister is pregnant and I am so thankful that I am going to be an Aunt! My brothers and doing great and maturing before my eyes which is crazy! My little sister is graduating!! WHAT that is crazy!! I remember playing hide and seek and saying go hide I will come find you and you waiting for a really loonnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggg time for Nikkie and I to come find you!! My mom and stepdad are the best parents and grandparents ever! My dad I finally have a great relationship with PRaise GOd!!
5.)I am thankful for my friend this is the first time in my life that I have the relationships that I do! Some Shout outs
Lisabeth-what do I say God has placed you in my life and I so thankful for it!! I love that we have gone through this journey together. Are kids are totally getting married!!
Jenny- although you will not read this I can not believe that I have found someone so much like me I swear we seperated at birth LOL!!
Julie,Amy and Becca-Crazy that our little ones are all having their first holidays already! Love you guys and I am so thankful that God placed you all in my life.
Colleen-Love you girl so much!!!
There really are so many other women that God has placed in my life that if I named them all it would take forever!!All of these women have been my lifelines when I need prayer or just an ear to vent to! I have never experienced love like this and it is only my God that I have
6.) Finally my home I am thankful for. I am amazed at how God ochestrated the whole thing but We feel truly blessed that he has given us this wonderful home to create memories in and fill with his love and blessings!!
I am so thankful for so many other things and as I look back and read what I have written how awesome that everything has God in it all!!!!!
HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!

I should be cleaning...........

I am feeling so loved right now!! I had a great talk with my husband about things that I hate talking about finances and it actually went really good. I know that God tells us to not worry and I am aware that this is my 1 issue infact it is my middle name Mariana Josephine Worry Cathers!!! I worry about everything from when I will have time to clean, cook, what time I have to get up in the morning (I check my alarm at least 10 times before bed), I worry about having enough money for the present and future and I worry about how much I have spent in the past. I worry about my kids at school and if they feel lovedenough by us, I worry about what people think of me as a friend, mom, daughter, wife and co-worker ALL THE TIME!! So I gave this conversation to God becuase we (Nathan and I) see things differently when it comes to spending money. Nathan will totally kill me when I say this but he is totally the women with this part of our relationship (maybe becuase I came from a single mom family who did everything). Like everyone who knows us knows that Nathan has way more clothes, shoes and products than I do. Not that I don't care about looks I just have kids that need these things and not that Nathan does not think that way I just think as the mom (or as me) you worry about spending money on yourself when you could get something for your child. Anyways back to the converstation we talked and figured things out and I feel so much better! I went grocery shopping and spent less then I ever do for TWO weeks of grocery shopping! I have been making baby food all morning which I just love doing because 1. my son is getting all natural food and 2. I am saving my family LOTS of money by making his food. I just feel loved today because I gave this issue over to God and in return for trusting him things are falling into place. I can honestly say that at this moment I am not worrying about anything.
Well maybe just about dinner and what time I have to start it so it is done in time and the fact that I have to clean and instead I am bloggin..............Okay give me some credit at least I am aware of my issue stepping out of DENIAL is the first step LOL

Life

Well we were all better and now I have Strep!!! Anyways life of a mom of three I guess. We are getting ready to have our housewarming party this next weekend. We are really exctied becuase we have nevre lived somewhere, where we could have people over and not worry about the people who share our walls!
I am also adjusting to having a Jordan in kindergarten! It is so different I was really sad that I had to miss her first field trip to the Cider Mill but I took the 31st off so I could go to her Halloween party! It is so much fun listening to her talk about her day and all the things she has learned. This week it is all about the fact that she gets to wear her PJs to school and she also has picture day on Friday! Which by the way is a huge RIP off! I can not believe how much they charge to take pictures.
Other good news Nathan's new position is going good and her even has gotten more of a raise (he just told me last night)! God is totally with us in all that is going on in our lives and it feels so good to not have a burden that God is taking care of it all! Even though things will be tight I know that God will take care of us and that all of our needs will be met and that is the best feeling of all!!
So thank you to all that are coming this weekend look forward to seeing you!!

We need prayer

Well where do I start? My kids (no joke) have been sick on and off since the middle of September! We have had everything from just the common cold, strep, croup (twice) and yes now the FLU!! Mariana woke up Sunday morning with as she called it (okay if you have a weak stomach DO NOT READ) throw up from her butt!! I WARNED YOU! It was non stop just that until 4pm today and then she was throwing up and has been for the last 6 hours!!!
My night has been cleaning up puke and S*&T from mariana and then nice diapers from the baby. Then when Sammy wanted to eat Mariana was throwing up and then Jordan wanted attention! I have used two BIG containers of lysol wipes a huge thing of gateraid (which probably has be chucked up) and two rolls of paper towles!! Oh and like 5 rolls of toliet paper not to mention my hands are raw from washing them. I now have Mariana laying on her couch watching a show hoping she will fall asleep and Sammy sleeping and Jordan crying becuase it is not fair that she has to go to sleep and Mariana gets to watch TV! So an hour ago I was feeling sorry for myself that I am here and needing a break and not getting one! I checked my email only to find out that one of CR's participants has committed scuicide! Here I am complaining about all that I have going on when someone I know is now a widow with three kids! So we need prayer but my friends family needs it more! So all those that are prayer warriors pray on!!!

God always has a perfect plan

So I know this whenever things are going crazy I know this. I say "Okay God I know that you know the bigger picture so I am submitting this to you". Well here is a testimony to that! Nathan's job is going really good so good that I am going to start working part time at Handprints!! At first I was sad becuase I would be loosing my lead teacher position and my scholarship for school but I felt like God was saying he has a plan. I let my bosses know and they are working on replacing me. There are some things that are up in the air that I can not talk about right now but pray that I let God guide me in my decisions and not what I want. I tend to make up signs that it is from God becuase I want it and then it blows up in my face in the end. I am really happy I mean really happy!! If you have a close relationship with me you know that it has been a long time coming! My marriage is finally coming together we are on the same page putting Christ in the center of our lives fully!! I love being a mom I am actually making Sam's baby food and still nursing (which is a milestone for me becuase I stopped by now with both the girls)! I really feel like God is showing me why all that we went through was part of his perfect plan!!! I love it when he lets us have glimpses of what he is doing up there and I am glad that I do not have to worry about it that it is all in his hands!!!

Three Sick Kids

I feel like I have gotten into the routine of having three kids that is until they all got sick!! First Jordan almost 2 weeks ago got a high fever that lasted a week then Sammy got Croup and then Mariana was last to follow. Then Jordan's fever returned!! I am on my fourth day off and Tomorrow will be my fiffth!! If I still worked at the Doctors office I would have been fired but I am blessed to have a job that understands that Family is first and foremost!! I have not slept it feels like in almost a week becuase I am either woken up by the baby or Mariana who is now having nightmeres! She has never seen anything scary so it is not that type nightmere it is here screaming at the top of her lungs "I WANT TO HOLD SAMMY"!!! or "GIVE THAT BACK DORDAN"!!! It is the funniest and the scariest thing to wake up to at 3 in the morning LOL! It is at these times that I wish I was a stay at home mom becuase then I would not have the guilt that I do for staying home with my sick kids (I know I should not have the guilt so please do not tell me so because I know). I have to say (you would know if you read my blog like from a month ago) I have never wanted to be a stay at home mom becuase I could never do it but lately I have been thinking what it would be like to be with my kids all day!!!! HMMMMM.....So here is some space for all of you that want to scream TOLD YA SO at me LOL

I am an Awe...........

I was just online checking my emails when I saw one that said Have to watch by my friend Nanci so I clicked on it and saw get the kleenex box ready! The link was to God Tube and I am in Awe. The video was of a concert by Lifehouse that did a skit called Everything. It started with a girl who found Christ and just the feeling that comes as a new follower and then how the things of the world slowly come back and pull you away until Christ is in the back of the line and you are being pulled into drinking, drugs, money, love etc. I seriously cried watching this like a baby. It just reminds me that no matter what God is always there just waiting for me to continue to come back to him. The things of the world pull me down and empty me out but Christ always grabs my hand and takes on the battle for me! I am in complete Awe of the love that Christ has for me and am reminded that I am to daily put him above all else! Thank you Nanci for sending me that email Nathan and I were in tears. It was a great reminder for us both to live for him daily!!!

It is Time....

Finally we are moving! I am so excited that these past couple of days have seemed to drag on and on. I just wish that there was magic button to push that would pack all of our things. Right now I should be packing and instead I am typing this Blog. I feel kinda (just kinda LOL) bad because Nathan is at the house right now unloading another load of boxes! This is just such a blessing for us that it does not seem real. I know some of you are probably thinking okay okay get over it already but I can't. I have been praying for a house for us to live in nothing to big just a place that we could call home and God has given this to us and I am so grateful.

Tired!!

Okay so maybe I am a little slow but working full time has finally caught up to me!! I am so tired!! I had a little break down about an hour ago my poor husband! I literally cried about everything from dishes to laundry to how crazy my job is! I totally love my job but there are 5-6 babies in my class everyday now and I am feeling overwhelmed! My assistant in my class will be leaving soon and I am unsure of the one that has been hired to help and if you work or have worked with me in my class I am very ANAL!! I just am overwhelmed with packing and all that goes with moving. Please if you think about it Pray for me and please share with me your break down moments so I do not feel so alone in this LOL!!

Today was the BIG Day!!

Well today was Jordan's big day!! We woke up this morning and I made Breakfast (okay I just poured the cereal but still it requires being awake!) for Jordan and Mariana and then began our morning of getting ready for Kindergarten. We took some pictures here at home and then more at my moms house! Jordan wanted Sammy to come to her new school but Mariana stayed at my moms. So we walked the same walk that I walked 20 years ago!! We lined up in the Gym with all the other Kindergarteners and their parents. Then in walked Jordan's teacher who I must I already love! She introduced herself to Jordan and us and then the tears started! Now you are probably thinking mine but no they were Jordans and I mean not only tears but SOBS! This is not like Jordan though she is shy at first she has never reacted this way. So I had to hold back my tears to show her that this was a good thing. We then made our long walk to her little classroom and found her name at the Green table! It took us 5 minutes to get her calmed down enough to wirte her name on her paper and then make her way to the carpet to listen to the story. Then the minute the teacher said that soon we will say goodbye to your parents she ran over to us and the SOBS started agian! I held it together but in my head all I could think was I am a horrible mother I need to take her back home with me and homeschool her!!! LOL!!! But once it was time for the parents to leave the teacher took Jordan's hand and I pried off her other from mine we left. She was fine but then I lost it!! I cried the whole walk back to my moms house hoping that she would do okay. Then (because the 1st day is only a half-day) 2 1/2 hours later made my way back with my mom, Sammy and Mariana in tow to pick Jordan up. When she came out to greet us she was so happy and had so much to tell us about her day! I made it, she made it and my mom made it LOL!! WHEW I feel like I deserve an award or something!

I feel old....

I know I know those of you that are older are going to get mad at me but I do. My daughter, my oldest daughter is now starting kindergarten in 4 days! I can not believe that she is already 5 years old and going to be in school. It really has gone by fast and before I know it she will be graduating from high school. I have taken the day off and Nathan is going to go into work late so that we can walk her to school (from my moms house) and then walk her to her class and I know that I will be crying and she will be saying "its okay mommy I will see you later". Yesterday we went to Rose Kidd (that is her school and the funny thing is that is where I went and my brother and sisters) to see who her teacher was going to be (something I did every year with Kristen my friend from across the street). I was having flash backs from my elementary years! We found her name under Ms. Veghalas class! She is so excited and I am too (really I am) but it all seems overwhelming for me. Then I got the school lunch schedule and I thought she is too little to eat with the big kids and I started to think of ways that I could convince the teacher that she should eat in the classroom or even better with the teacher in the lounge!!!! I know I am going crazy but my first born is going to school where I can not keep an eye on her. Then I saw on the window above her class list a notice for all kindergarten parents about a parent only meeting next Thursday! Our first little meeting Nathan is going to leave work early so we can go. It is all really exciting! When ever we talk about kindergarten Jordan just gets this huge smile on her face and asks a million questions like What she should bring for lunch, what her lunch pail will look like, what outfit I think she should wear and if she will know any of her new friends??????????
I guess I have to be thankful and enjoy this time of her life when she includes me in her first day of school. Soon it will be off to high school and I know that Nathan will not take the morning off and Jordan will definately not let us walk her to her new class...................................

I am so happy!! Things are just starting to come together again for us; God is so good! I finished my 8 week online course with an A+! I did it with a one month old and 2 other little ones on no sleep and sometimes online for 6-8 hours a night. My poor husband would come home from work I would hand him the baby and not look his way till about midnight! I am so happy to be done and I feel a sense of accomplishment! PRAISE GOD
Last Friday we were brave and took our first family trip to Pitsburg to visit friends. We had so much fun and honestly the driving was not so bad if you ask me (if you ask Nathan he will beg to differ)! Then on Monday we went to the Nickleback concert which was so much fun! We did have some pot smokers sitting by us that brought back some memories for us both! But all in all it was great!
We are now just enjoying the down time right now because in a couple weeks we leave for the Cathers annual trip to Traverse City and then back to work for me!! Life is good though my kids are healthy and not driving me crazy for the most part. I really feel blessed to have the life I have.

I feel like myself again

So I do I feel like myself again because I am back to work. That may sound horrible to some of you that love staying home and think that everyone should but I do not. I love working and I truly love my job! I have worked many jobs and believe me I mean a lot (starting from age 14!!!). I have never ever woke up thinking I am excited to work but at this job I truly wake up and think YEAH I get to go to work (though sometimes I wish I could sleep a little later than 4am but ya know). I do miss the baby and Jordan and Mariana while I am working but I really love what I do. I love being with the babies all day and playing and feeding them and yes even the diaper changing is fun (most of the time LOL). I just love kids so much and I feel so blessed that I get paid to work in slippers and play all day with babies!! I am back into the swing of things at work and feeling confident in the talent that God has given me.
Life is good I can not complain (maybe just about being tired but what Mom of three isn't feeling tired)! Things are great but pray for me the next month as we pack for the fiffth time since we have been married. We move next month on the 15th God willing! We are so excited and feeling God's love!!

God is so Good

For those of you that do not know (which would be surprising becuase everyone I meet right off the bat knows my life story LOL) but we fell on really hard times a couple of years ago Nathan and I bought a home just months before our second daughter was born 10 weeks early this sent us in a down ward spiril of bad credit decisions. By the time our daughter was 18 months we had foreclosed on our home, lost our cars and Nathan's job. In the mean time we were dealing with addictions and other things but all along God was at work. We really felt like God stripped all of that away so that everything that came after was ultimatly from him and him only. We needed a wake up call, it was rough and their were times that we did not know what we were going to eat we would go to our parents a couple of times a week so that we could have dinner and have the leftovers for our lunches. Even through it all we just kept trusting God that one day he would restore it all for us and we would one day have a home again. After 1 year back at his parents with two kids and new jobs we were offered a trailor from a family at church for free! We were so grateful. I had to get over the fact that I did not want to be in a trailor (I have to admit that I was feeling embarrassed) I never thought I would end up in a trailor (anyone who reads this that lives in one I hope that no one is offended it was just something that God had to bring me out of). I had to come to terms with it is not the home but what you make of it and I had to be grateful that God was providing us with a home that we could afford. The last couple of weeks we have run into some things on our street that has made me fearful! I struggle with fears if you know me you know what I mean and I have had to give these to God and all along I have felt that something was about to change I just didn't know what. Well this week was my first week back to work and a friend of mine (well more than that she is a mentor to me always praying with me and has never once judged Nathan or I) told me that her brother just bought a home at Masonic and Kelley in Roseville 3 beds 1 bath basement hardwood floors fenced in yard 1 car garage and in our price range! I kinda passed on it saying that we might have another place that we were looking in to. Well as of yesterday that fell through and the first thing I thought of was what my friend suggested. I called her immediatly tonight and she told me that her sister-in-law wanted to talk to me. I called her and she is a Christian and wants a good family in their home and is willing to bring the rent down and work in a deposit and no credit check! How great is God! We prayed right before calling her and asked God to work out the small details of our credit and a deposit and without me saying anything she told me there would be no credit check! We are going tomorrow to look at it! Please pray that we use wisdom in our decision and that all our questions will be clearly answered and we seek God through it all!! I am truly grateful for the life that we are now leading becuase without God in our lives I do not know where Nathan and I would be

Working Mom of 3!!

So it is the third day of being back to work and all I can say is WOW! Monday was very hard I woke up at 5am and got ready, washed the dishes, and then got the kids off. Sammy and Jordan to my moms first and I cried and cried then Mariana and I left for Handprints and I cried on and off for the next two hours. I am learning to pump again which believe me is not fun! I would much rather have the fiffteen minutes of bonding with my son rather than having two plastic peices suck at me (it is as painful as it sounds)! I do have to say that I am very grateful to be working at a place that gives me the chance to pump. Two great friends of mine that work in the church (Handprints is located in our church Rockpointe) came and brought me flowers to encourage me on my first day. After work I practically flew to my moms (which is down the street from work) and ran in only to find that my little boy would barely eat all day from the bottle. I felt horrible and once we were home he nursed for almost three hours and twice in the night!!
Tuesday was better I woke up at 4am and off to work agian Sammy ate better and I cried less. Today was even better and I am feeling like we are all adjusting to the new schedule. I am a better mom when I am working, I know that this may sound horrible for those of you that are home with your kids but I am. I can get things done around the house better, spend the time I have with my kids better and I love my job so in other words if I am happy my kids are too!!
So thank you to all of you who prayed for me and all those that sent me encouraging myspace comments it really did help!! Have a great week and if you don't hear from me it is becuase I am a working mom of three!!!

Finally

I am so excited! For the last 5 years I have been an Aunt to Nathan's Nieces and Nephews (5 of them) but I have thought about the day that I would become a Zia (Aunt in our family) to my sister or brothers kids! I found out last night that my sister and brother-in-law are having their first baby! I screamed so loud when I heard and then cried and then laughed and then cried (you get the picture). I felt like I was the one pregnant!
You see my sister and I are very close, well I should say my entire big Italian family is very close and this is so exciting. During my pregnancies and after giving birth my sister was always right there to cook, clean ,give the girls baths anything I needed. She is so awesome and I am so excited to be able to return the favor. Not to mention paybacks are a B**** :) she taught our kids to pick their nose, play in the dirt and shake their booties!!! So I will be right there with lots of candy before bed and never have any kleenex for a runny nose LOL!! The most exciting part of it all is that Sammy and their baby will only be a year apart and at this time seems like a lot but when they are older they can play together and be good friends! So to say the least I am very HAPPY to soon hear a little one call me ZIA!!!

Doing Better

So today I am better. I had the worst school week ever and I did not have a meltdown, I got through it with an A! I only have 4 more weeks to go. I expected my summer maternity leave to be different but having to do school work 7 days a week changes plans a little bit. I am very excited to be taking a couple of vacations this summer though. We are going to PA to visit Kent and Erica, Maddie and Kalea which our girls are soooooo excited for. Then in August we are off to the annual Cathers trip to Traverse City! All with three kids I know I am crazy!!
I do have some prayer requests for all of you out there. Nathan's best friend Chuck died last June 25th! A very big shock and we have been struggling the last couple of weeks knowing that one year is coming up. We were very close to chuck had many years growing up together and this is a struggle for me but more for Nathan. If you could pray for some peace for us in the next couple of weeks to come. As well as Chucks there kids Gabe, Charlie jr, and Caden and their mother Tiffany would be great as well.
Well hopefully after the rain clears the girls and I can go back outside! Have a great week ALL!

AHHHHHHH!!!!!

Okay so I have never had a blog before but I love journaling so how hard can this be?! Today is one of those days that I just feel like screaming outside really loud but I don't want to scare my kids or neighbors so I have settled for screaming in my pillow with the door shut. Not as much satisfaction as I wanted. I am hot our AC is not working, my son has been nursing every hour since 7am, I have a huge paper due for school that I do not understand at all, My three year old poured pop all over the kitchen and then peed on the floor!! She is my one that will put me in my grave soon. I love her to death and I know that I will one day look back and laugh but today (meaning this stage) I cry. She refuses to potty train, throws mean tantrums since she was about 9 months old, she (stop reading if you easily get sick) plays with her poop!!! But even with all that she is so sweet right now talking so very sweetly to her baby brother which back in my head I have to wonder if that is so I will not pay attention to what might be her next step, getting into some kind of trouble. So if you know me well and I mean if you knew me as a child you are laughing right now because I did all of these things! It makes me very scared for the teenage years. So I sit here writing a blog when I should be writing a paper, feeding the baby, and watching my trouble maker ( I have learned to multi task)! I feel a little better now until the next thing!!

Best Birthday EVER!!

Thank you to everyone who sent me Happy Birthdays via Myspace LOVED IT!! So you ask what did I do today???
I first started my new job which is even more amazing than I thought it was going to be! Then I went to see the Hannah Montana and Miley Cyrus 3D movie with my girls! It was so much fun and I would not have spent my day any other way. I loved looking over at Jordan with her 3D glasses on and singing all the songs and looking over at me with this huge smile on her face (brought me to tears)!! Then looking over at Mariana who had her shoes and socks off laying down on the WAY TOO BIG seat and eating her popcorn (before dinner how dare I :) ) and trying to drink her pop laying down!! I love these two so much just typing it brings a smile to my face.
The movie was great and then Mariana did not make it to the bathroom in time and peed all over the bathroom floor of the movie theater and as I type this I am remembering that I was supposed to let someone know so they could clean it up. Well to defend myself I was trying to carry a urine soaked 3 year old, 2 bags of popcorn and three pops to the car that was buried in 5 inches of snow!! Oh well it was a great night! I am going to go now and spend the rest with my husband as soon as he comes in from shoveling!! Love you all and thanks again!!

Motherhood

So I have been a mom now since I was 20 and I have come across many women who have judged me because of how young I am! I was judged in the Pediatrician's office, at Birthday Parties,Dance class,sometimes even Church I have just gotten used to it in a sense.
Well when Jordan was going to be going toKindergarten I thought finally there has got to be some other young moms but if not for sure it will be better. I had all these dreams of meeting some moms and making some new friends WELL!! Since Jordan's first day the moms do not talk to me at all (no exaggerating here). The occasional Hello when there is not another mom there. In fact they all thought that I was her sister not mother. I am by far like 10-15 years the youngest mom there. I volunteered at a class party and no one talked to me but the teachers father!!! I thought well I am just going to have to get used to this.
Fast forward to today and I volunteered to help out on Tuesdays in the classroom which is exciting for both Jordan and I. Afterwards the other mom said nice to meet you but she didn't meet me so I introduced myself she tried to make small talk but I could tell she really did not want to. So what is up with this not that I want to be best friends with these moms but just becuase I am young does not mean I have some disease! AND really I am not that young anymore I know I know I am still in my 20s but really HOW long am I going to be the young mom of three kids and WHO CARES if I decided to have kids before a carreer I am not judging them and WHY do I care so much!!
Okay I feel better now that it is off my chest. On another more important note Nathan's Aunt Gert died today so if you think about it please keep his family in your prayers. This is hard for Nathan becuase he barely knew his grandparetns so his Aunt has been that figure so he is having a hard time. Well have a great week!!