Let's be real....

So by now even if you are not a close friend or a family member you know that I am an open book..probably too open for some people. I really believe that if you can not be honest with people about your struggles than how will you ever know that you are not alone in what you are going through? I have been praying for a long time that our church would start a group at Awaken for family members of addicts because I just haven't found the support I wanted at Nara-non meetings. I think I have missed the spiritual side to the meetings that I always found at Celebrate Recovery like when someone is really struggling you can all gather around them and pray for them it was huge for me. I loved the relationships I built because of our common struggle and knowing that with Christ all things are possible. So a couple weeks ago when a friend of mine sent me a picture text of the next line up of groups and the type of group I (and some of my friends) had been praying for was one of the groups we were so excited!! I purchased my book right away and have been reading it already and my highlighter is almost dry. The book is written by a recovering addict and it is amazing!  I feel like this group is going to do amazing things for a lot of people who are in my spot right now. It is very hard to be married to an addict you wear a lot of hats and become very good at being the private investigator but all I can say is that I love my husband more than anything in this world and because God has been at the center of everyone of my days I know that I am doing what I am supposed to be doing. God is doing amazing things in my life and my husbands life and I feel like there is a reason why we are going through these struggles. I have been feeling lately that God is saying that I need to take this season and listen...learn...and trust him. I believe that no matter what happens God is there and the pretty cool thing is that he has set it all up already. I have never felt closer to God in all of my life. Because I am so open with our struggles I have had lots of people tell me that they too are struggling being married to an addict. I look around and people that I never would have guessed that they were struggling with the same thing I am. I have learned that there are some couples who have to live double lives and that has got to be way harder than what I am going through. I know Nathan doesn't always agree with how open I am but I think it is being true to yourself and allowing God to use you to help other people but also have the potential to learn from others as well. My prayer right now is that anyone else who sees in our church bulletin that the family members of addicts group starts soon will take the step to be part of it and I pray that anyone who reads this who may not go to our church decides to take that same step because I am living proof that being open and allowing God to work in you is by far way better than closing the doors and windows to your heart and home and pretending...