Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Not sure how to title this one....it has been a while since I have blogged. I am in one of those moods you know where you just feel like you are going through the motions. Things are really busy at work and at home. Sammy just turned two which is CRAZY! We have had birthday parties every weekend sometimes two a day and have three more this month. But it is a fun crazy. I am at work taking a break from the craziness and I feel like I want to blog about something but I am worried someone will read it that can not. I will just say that someone who is in my life now is bringing back memories from my past that scare me. It is not that this person is bad it is just that this persons paths have crossed that of someone who really caused serious harm to me in the past. Lately I have been dealing with this in different situations and it makes me question have I moved past this issue?? Is it normal to know that you have forgiven someone and moved on but then years later to deal with emotions again? Then I wonder if I am even questioning is that God telling me that I have unresolved issues? Or if you are someone who has been abused do you always have issues with it? Like certain smells or names or places bring it back? I have always struggled with nightmares and sometimes they are more intense then others and lately they are strong where I wake up and feel like I have not even slept. Hmmmmmmm
On another note our church is starting some new small groups called Pathways and we are really excited about joining a group soon. It makes me nervous though because we signed up to be invited into a group which makes me think of Gym in elementary school and being the last couple picked lol!! Seriously though I know that God will provide a group for us that will give us the chance to meet new people and be encouraged and encourage others. I am really excited for this. Maybe I should go back to work now..............

1 comment:

Becca said...

if what you are mostly feeling is fear, it's not from God. God hasnt given us a spirit of fear...so pray for strength to rise above it. remind yourself that God has healed you and that you are safe in his arms...the devil loves to dig up our past so that we get distracted from living life and moving forward. You're strong...you CAN get past ths!