Cathers Crew

Life worth living

2012-01-31T14:26:00.003-05:00

So I will be 30 in exactly 5 days 9 hours and 32 minutes!!! Crazy how a couple years ago I thought people who were 30 looked old lol now people who are 30 are really young :) I have had a list of things I wanted to do before I was 30 and not one thing is really crossed off that list. I mean I have done lots of things in these last 10 years that I am really proud of most importantly being married and having 4 beautiful kids! I am speaking of small things that I have always wanted to do but always seem to chicken out. But I am taking a deep breath and I am determined that at the end of my birthday month (that's right I celebrate the month minus the 9th which is Mariana's bday and the 15th which is my mother in laws bday) I will post the first thing that will be crossed off my list!! So excited and nervous all at the same time!! and like my cousin Kim said I will be 30 the whole year so I have exactly 372 days 9 hours 24 minutes and 35 seconds to cross things off my list!

White as Snow

2012-01-19T11:57:00.002-05:00

I am amazed at how fitting it is that we have lots of snow today! It is like in Isaiah 1:18 "Come now, let us argue this out," says the LORD. "No matter how deep the stain of your sins, I can remove it. I can make you as clean as freshly fallen snow. Even if you are stained as red as crimson, I can make you as white as wool." This verse is exactly what I needed today along with this snow. Today is a new day one that is going to be remembered on the calendar as the day that our lives took a shift for the better. I know God has amazing plans and he is going to do amazing things with our family. These last couple of weeks I have become closer to God than I ever thought possible. It took something happening for me to open my heart completely to God and tell him whatever it took I would be willing. It has been really hard but I am learning to take all my thoughts captive and allowing God to change and mold me into what I am supposed to be. I am in awe once again at what he has done in me and what I know he will continue to do. I feel so blessed that I serve a loving God that loves me so much that he takes his time with me and shows me things they way I need to see them to understand. God doesn't show anyone something the same way because he knows us better than we know our selves if that sentence even makes sense to me it does lol. I am learning so much about who I am and who I want to be that it is only God in me working that can explain it. I am praying today that as I take this step I remember that "in my weakness he is strong".
I am so happy all of this is happening before my BIG 3-0 in 18 days!!!!!

Playtime

2012-01-12T16:34:00.002-05:00

My son is so smart it cracks me up. I was making lunch and he starts telling me how he loves all of his old junky matchbox cars because they are so fun to play with. After lunch he asks me to play with him so he gets out all of his cars. He starts setting up all the cars and tells me in such a sweet voice "Here mommy I will let you play with the junky ones..remember those are my favorite"!

Can't Shut Up

2012-01-07T14:43:00.003-05:00

I know I post all the time about music but today it is what is getting me through the tough stuff!! So I am all about listen to Anthem Lights again!! I know boy band but they are all about Christ and spreading the word of God to those that need it and those that need the encouragement and each song either brings me to tears, raising praise to God or wanting to jump around and that is all the things I need today!! So here is their song Can't Shut Up Last night was Jordan's first sleepover and if you know me and my past then you know for me to allow that is huge!! It was all God that I did not freak and call every couple hours to see if she is ok..it helped that the P family is so amazing :) So because Jordan was there I decided to do something special with Mariana and we decided to go on a date. Nathan usually does the dates with the girls so I have never done just one of them and myself that didn't include shopping of some type. So I told her we could go to a real restaurant for dessert. My mom watched Sam and Issy for me and off we went to IHOP lol. We had a great waiter who I think was amazed at my Mariana's manners :) we bother ordered and when the bill came i saw kids eat free! We had a blast talking and drawing and talking and talking and talking (talking is what you do best if your name is Mariana). Then when we left she had a giggle fit and told me this was the best day of her whole life except when she goes to church because that is all about Jesus! She is so precious and I was so thankful to have that time. When we came home Sam, Mariana and I had a coloring contest and a little sleepover of our own! When we said our prayers Mariana thanked God for giving us enough money to have a date and for the waiter giving kids their food for free ;) I believe that God has prepared me and my kids for what we are walking through right now and even though I am sad at times I am in awe of what God does for me...again I say it ME!! Today was a bunch of up and down emotions when finally I got the kids their lunch and sat down by myself and just prayed and wrote. I feel like this time we are walking through is going to be what makes the rest of our lives and teaches us that praising God in the storm is soooo worth it. I can not believe that in just a little over a month Nathan and I will be married for 10 years! That is huge and I am excited to celebrate that with him and I am very aware that if it were not for God in our life than we would not be married again. I have some people right now that you might want to call haters lol but I am going to push them to the side and take all my thoughts captive and give them to GOD.

New Year...New beginnings...New School

2012-01-05T09:08:00.002-05:00

Yesterday was the girls first day at their new school. I left work to pick them up and take them to karate. Jordan had a very hard day :( she cried the whole way to karate. She said that her teacher kept asking her if she knew things and she didn't so she felt very embarrassed. She said that she played at recess by herself. I cried (although I tried not to) but I told her that sometimes kids her age are scared to ask someone new to play with them because what if she said no? I told her that we will just keep praying and in a couple days things will be better. Once we left karate she had her confidence back and was smiling and happy!
Mariana on the other hand met two friends and loves her class! She said that no one played with her right away at recess but once she ran around a little some little girls came up to her to play :)
There are a lot of things happening in our lives right now and although I am usually an open book right now I am learning to keep my mouth shut :) So I am leaning into God more than ever right now and it is amazing at the things he is doing through others. The girls needed school supplies and two family members helped out with that and we were able to get some food from our church which was a huge help. That night Mariana said her prayers and thanked God for her two aunties that gave us money for supplies and for our church so we could have some food. I love that my kids understand that it is God who is really providing things and I pray that through their eyes I am able to remain thankful and see Gods love too! Childlike faith is amazing!!
A friend of mine said that when her son was having trouble at recess she told him to talk to God as his friend so I passed that on to Jordan this morning and I am going to pray extra hard for her today.
This morning when I dropped them off Marianas new little friend passed me a note and it was an invitation for Mariana to go to Church with her!! I think that this little friend is perfect for Mariana because they are both good little witnesses :)
So this first week of the new year has been one of the toughest of my life it has also been one of the best. It is only because of God that I am able to have the peace and joy that I have right now. GOD IS SO GOOD!!

Sammy's Prayer

2012-01-03T16:38:00.001-05:00

Last night while putting Sammy to sleep he wanted to pray..So I started praying for everyone in our family and then he says" and for Daddy and China"! So I guess Jesus put the all of China on Sammy's Heart <3

Life Happens....

2011-12-30T16:44:00.005-05:00

So a couple weeks ago I blogged about how I could feel like things were about to change. Since we have moved back with Nathans parents (and yes that is where we live now in case you didn't know that) things have been crazy. We have had to adjust the kids to living somewhere else, the girls are starting a new school, Nathan has been busy studying for tests for work and lots more that is not my story to tell. I have been keeping a prayer journal and for about 2 months now I have been praying for Nathan and what God is trying to show us with his new job at the new dealership. I have been praying for myself that my fears of loosing everything once again not be entertained and that I can lean into God and trust that he will provide and that his plan is perfect. I struggle don't get me wrong just ask Nathan when I have a meltdown get out of my way (not an excuse I need to work on anger management..one thing at a time people). There are days that I cry A LOT there are days that I feel so close to God and have an amazing amount of faith. (by the way I am not blogging this for attention or any poor thing comments because this is just an outlet for me if you feel like I am doing this for attention don't read it because you don't know me too well then). I have thought about keeping things quiet but then I am not being my true self. I feel like if I put it out there than that is more people praying and maybe more people that will be encouraged or feel like they are not alone in what they might be going through.
Last night Nathan lost his job! We had a feeling that it was going to happen but it didn't soften the blow by any means. I trust God and like I said I could feel change was coming and I knew that once I surrendered my plans and my will that God would do the cleaning that was necessary. I believe that his plans are so much better than my own and that doesn't mean easier. I feel like screaming at the same time though because I also have 4 kids that I want to feel safe and loved and a husband that really does work hard for his family and deserves to have things go right. Again though right in my head is different than Gods plan. I think about when we left my old job which was a mess of a place and then two weeks later found out I was preggers with Isabell I went a little crazy. I could only think we have three kids and one on the way and I no longer have a job. If that would have never happened I wouldn't have found the place I work at now which I love! I know that God loves us more than I could ever love my own children so he does want us to be happy and have success so I am going to continue to place my faith and trust in him (and allow myself the occasional break down ;) ). So if you would like to say a prayer for us do not to find a perfect job but pray that the one that God would want for Nathan would be there, pray that we continue to look to God for the right path to follow and that we have peace and clarity through it all and that we remember to praise him even in the storm :)

Feeling like a change is brewing....

2011-12-18T23:53:00.002-05:00

Do you ever feel like something big is going to happen?? I feel like that today maybe it was the sermon at church today that just really has had me thinking today or it could even be that I am turning 30 soon lol (i think it is the sermon). I was sitting in church today with that intense look on my face I was really trying to take it all in. I wonder what Randy thought if he saw me today because I felt like i was on the edge of my seat lol. I have total faith that all this junk I am walking through is for a reason and that God is doing amazing things behind the scenes :) A friend of mine at Awaken last week was so generous and gave me a big hug and just told me that she knew God was doing big things and that this was just a moment we were going through (not sure if that is exactly what she said but it was what I heard). This last week I did not get to journal much and I felt the difference. But tonight after sending an email to a friend I sat here and prayed, you know that kind where you feel like God has his arms wrapped around you and you are just talking to him :) God has also been showing me a lot of things through other people that have truly encouraged me and I love that. A friend of mine was so blessed this past week with gifts for herself and her kids that it makes my heart overflow for them with happiness. I seriously have been in awe of what God has done for her, its like a little reminder that he loves all of us the same and wants all of us to be blessed. I am not talking about just gifts I am talking about the peace that he gives us and the faithfulness, grace and mercy. OK sorry for the randomness tonight, well whatever big things good or bad I know he will prepare the way for us. I hope everyone has a great week!

My little May May

2011-12-16T19:08:00.004-05:00

So the little girl that God uses to help me learn patience for the last year has really struggled. She has been having not only angry temper tantrums that last sometimes 2-3 hours but she had to repeat 1st grade because of some learning disabilities. She had a really hard time understanding why she had to stay in 1st grade when her other friends where going on to 2nd grade. I did my best to explain that she would be the oldest and be able to help the younger kids how things go in 1st grade and that by next summer she would be even better in Math and Reading (not sure if I handled it right but I did my best). She was diagnosed with ADD back in March we tried medication but she started getting headaches and then the medication was on back order so she went months without it. This time was the hardest time for our family her outbursts continued and then since younger siblings like to mimic the older Sam and Isabell started having tantrums. There were days that I would close myself in the bathroom and cry because I couldn't take all the screaming. She ended last years school year at a .68 reading level meaning she was just half way through the kindergarten reading requirements. She entered kindergarten at a .98 and now she is a 1.38!!! I have had to retrain my thinking and realize that she is not a 1st grader that should be in 2nd grade but a 1st grader period. She has not been on meds and although there are still tantrums we are dealing with them differently. I have cut out almost all TV and computer time so that she is strictly playing with toys during the week. I am so proud of her and how far she has come in these last 5 months. She really is my daughter that gives me gray hair and headaches but she is also the one that has the biggest heart of any child I know. If she sees a homeless person she wants to give them money, if she hears that an adoption agency has children to adopt she wants me to adopt them lol. She is always telling me that a child in her class needs prayer and she always remembers to pray for them. Today on our way home she said that she knows she was supposed to stay in her class again because a little boy was in a car accident yesterday and she was the only person who asked him why he was crying. God did good when he made my little may may so I will count the gray hairs and deal with the headaches because God has AMAZING plans for my little girl :)

Deal of the Day

2011-12-15T14:05:00.002-05:00

I went shopping for some Christmas presents for the girls with my mother in law and found a new store that I guess has been there for 6 months. Sears Apparel Warehouse on Hall road. It is where The Great Indoors used to be. Everything right now in the kids clothing is $5!! I found the cutest jeans and sweaters for the girls and great outfits for Isabell. It is really plain in side just racks and racks of clothing. Women's clothing is $7 right now and every Tuesday if you spend $25 you get one item (any item but outerwear) free! I am going back on Saturday to finish my shopping.

Happy Birthday Isabell

2011-12-13T13:25:00.005-05:00

This day two years ago I was being prepped to have a C-section with our 4th baby! I was so nervous..unsure how I could be a good mom to four kids since I was already overwhelmed with three.
I knew that she would be early because the two before her were, so it was not a surprise when I woke up early in the morning to severe cramping. Leaving the kids with my in laws off we went to the hospital. She was going to be 5 weeks early and since i was a pro with preemies what should I be afraid of right? Wrong I was worried she wouldn't be able to breath and was worried I would have to leave yet another baby in the NICU and go home without them in my arms. When Isabell was born she was very healthy we almost thought she would be able to stay in our room with us. She was born at 5"11 oz our 2nd biggest baby! When they were looking her over they realized she would have to be on oxygen and kept in the NICU. my recovery was my worst yet (just a confirmation that we made the right decision to tie my tubes;) ) I shook for hours, got sick and itched all over for 24 hours. When I finally got to see my baby I was yet again in awe of GOD! How he can create such amazing human beings in another human being is just beyond my understanding. She had the tiniest features of all of our kids and made the cutest little noises. Four days later I was released and delivered the news that she would have to stay..But Beaumont started a new program for preemies and their families. I was able to stay for free in a room across from the NICU so that I could nurse her on demand and bond with her. I was so thankful that family helped Nathan take care of the other three kids so I could bond with my baby and I am convinced that because of that bonding she was able to get home faster. She was released from the hospital at 7 days old! We were so blessed with our Christmas present and she has continued to bless our family. She is walking and talking and talking and talking and talking lol She is a diva for sure the baby of four and spoiled! I think we will keep her :) Happy 2nd Birthday Miss Isabell Dorothea Cathers!

Playing with Grandmas necklaces

An evening of Beauty...

2011-12-13T12:43:00.015-05:00

The girls were in desperate need of hair cuts. If you have girls then you know what I mean they wake up with a rats nest and then the next 20 minutes is spent trying to get knots out when someone is screaming and pulling away and crying! So off we went to see Stephanie, who has been a good friend of mine since High School and has been the only person to cut my hair since she was in hair school and I was pregnant with Jordan. She has done each of the kids first hair cut and the kids love her. This was part of the kids Christmas present from Nathans parents so Grandma came along for the experience.
Mariana decided to go first and since she wanted her hair cut short she was able to donate 6 inches to Children with Hair Loss. She also wanted bangs and I admit I tried talking her out of it but as you can see she looks adorable!!

Holding her donated Ponytail!

Isabell was next for her very first hair cut! She was unsure at first and then as you can see she went from pouting to crying to happy (once she got candy) She looks so cute though and came home to stare at herself in the mirror :)

Not sure I like this................. OK not liking this

Yummy sucker...I'm good now!

Jordan was last and she requested layers so long layers she got and looks so cute! She looked so grown up in the chair and was such a pro at this hair cut business ;)

Beautiful!! So Mature :)

PaRtY tImE!!!

2011-12-13T12:29:00.003-05:00

So here are just a few pics from Miss Isabells 2nd birthday Party! She is in love with penguins so the Happy Feet party was perfect for her. My mother in law knows a stay at home mom who is very talented and makes cakes out of her home. Her name is Christin Michalek and she did a great job on Isabell's Penguin cake. Click on her name to check out her website and all her fabulous cakes! I already have some ideas for the other kids birthdays and excited to use her again!

She was so excited about her party and was not happy that she had to wait to have cake :)

Although she received lots of great gifts and she loves all of them...the baby doll takes the prize!! My Nana and papa got her a peek a boo baby doll that talks and she is in heaven! She was squealing and couldn't wait for Nathan to take her out of the box. I wish we had a picture of my niece Madison though (she has the same baby at home) because she was very confused on why her baby was now at Isabell's house lol

Meeting Santa

2011-12-10T22:59:00.005-05:00

So we don't go every year to meet Santa because it is just not something that I have found fun...standing in line for hours with kids who are just going to cry once they get on the lap of the old creepy man. Well this week my sister in law invited us to come along with them to meet Santa at Somerset but the catch was we had to be there at 745am! I was really not sure Isabells ear infection had been back and I had a ton of stuff to do but the kids really wanted to go and I wanted to at least see what the Somerset Santa was all about. So at 630am I woke the kids up gave showers and out the door we went. We got there and my sister in law was already in line and once we got to the front desk our time was 904am...an hour to kill. Well since we have never been to Somerset we decided to let the kids go up and down the glass elevator and ride the escalators. One hour later we were called up to the castle as follows..Princess Lauren..Princess Jordan..Princess Mariana..Prince Salvatore and Princess Isabell! We walked into the castle and there was Santa and his helpers surrounded by beautiful Christmas decor! We took some pictures and he asked each child what they wanted...NO tears! Once we said our goodbyes we were escorted to a treasure chest full of coins (Sammy was beside himself) and each child picked three coins! We then spent the next 2 hours going to a list of stores to pick our prizes! Jordan: a bouncy ball that lights up, a microphone and a Lego guy..Mariana: two chocolate coins, a Lego guy and a bouncy call..Sammy: a Lego guy, two chocolate coins and a glow stick...Isabell: a crown, a glow stick and a microphone! They had a blast running back and forth from each store and through the North and South buildings (Sammy especially loved the sky walk which he called the road bridge lol). It was a really fun morning and I think we have found our new Santa tradition. Even better was the time we got to spend with family!
Waiting for Santa :)
Santa's Castle
Waiting inside the Castle for Santa
Santa asking each one what they wanted for Christmas
Sammy was not scared at all..Isabell was a little unsure
Digging for coins
He loved it!!

A much needed wake up call

2011-12-08T23:25:00.003-05:00

Today a friend that I once was very close to and because we all start having kids and lives become so busy pulled me aside and asked if i was upset with her??? She said that I always seem mad with her! I hope if she reads this she does not get offended that I am posting this but I am thankful she asked this. I feel like sometimes my face portrays one that puts people off. I am sometimes concentrating so hard that I don't realize that my face can come across as angry or lost. She is really a sweet friend that I have always admired and to think that for who knows how long my craziness has made her feel this way makes me a little sad. Being a mom to a big family and working makes it hard to have friends (and hard for my friends to have me as a friend). I have learned over the last year that having really good friends in my life is the most important thing and that no matter what I should never be too busy to stop and say hi with a smile to a friend.
Tonight in my group at church a friend said that as women we need to extend grace to each other. Why do we beat our girlfriends up? Why do we expect so much out of them? Why do we expect them to solve our problems? I really feel like for the first time in my life God is allowing me to have godly women in my life and showing me how to be a friend. So if you are reading this thank you for the little wake up call. I know you meant it differently but I really needed that tonight :)

Let the countdown begin....

2011-12-08T12:57:00.002-05:00

So I know Christmas is soon but I am talking about My little Isabell's 2nd BIRTHDAY!! I can not believe that she will be two years old! The other night I was holding her (she is the only one that willingly lets me rock her) and talking very quietly about when she was born and how sweet she was when she put her hand to my mouth and said "stop talking now"! She is our little Diva as we like to call her and she is very spoiled. She may have pushed me over the edge in regards to my sanity but she has blessed us in so many ways, I do not know what our little family would do if God didn't give us little Isabell :) so the countdown to the tears (for me) begins only 5 more days......

Yup I am back to my old self

2011-12-04T01:00:00.002-05:00

I knew my insomnia would be back in time and it is 101am and I am WIDE awake :) When I find a band I like I become totally obsessed...My new kick Anthem Lights ! Seriously click on the name of the band and listen to some of their songs!!! AMAZING!!
Anyway,I am in a place right now that is a bunch of ups and downs but God is in it all. I need to feel all the emotions that are going on right now so I accept it. I have been writing more in my journal and its more of a prayer to God and each entry is like 10 pages (I will need a new book in about 2 weeks at this rate) and it is really helping me work through all of my emotions and as usual praying for others will always make me feel better. I really feel like Gods timing is always on and when I say always I mean always :). In every BIG event in my life if I really look back maybe a month or two before God prepared me for it with either an encounter with someone or with another event. This season right now has had many of those moments that without my faith in God what would I think about my life?? Failure? Hopeless? worthless? Stuck? lonely? unloved? and as I write this it brings me to tears because I could easily think all of those things but instead my faith brings me right back to God and his love for ME..ME this person who really if you know my story (and maybe one day I will have the courage to post my entire 2word story) has messed up pretty bad on numerous occasions. He loves me so much that he plans everything ahead of me and each event has a purpose. If you want to argue this with me I am good at that I can show you exact points in my life that he put someone in my path that only made sense months later when something happened. So to think that there are people out there that really do feel those words and don't have that faith to lean on makes me cry. I have had to learn that people think its weird to tell your whole life story the minute you meet them but I feel like I can not hold in what God has done for me and continues to do for ME on a daily basis. His love is unchanging! unfailing! as far as the east is to the west! and he casts my sins away never to be found! So my words have to be LOVED! HOPE! MOVED! because he loves me no matter what which gives me hope to move towards the life he has for me!!

Frozen Doors=Lesson Learned

2011-11-30T18:12:00.004-05:00

So this morning was our first snowfall...yeah I know it wasn't much but a light dusting of snow. I woke up to my car doors frozen shut. Not a big deal unless you pulled 4 kids out of bed at 600am and got them out in the 31 degree weather only to find out the doors were frozen shut. I proceeded to pull on the doors until the front open got them all in the car and pulled out. It was 645am and now all my interior lights came on and the car was beeping at me because the doors were open (but still frozen shut) confusing I know. So we sat there for 20 minutes. I stared at the clock knowing that i now had missed the girls latchkey bus and would have to take them to school at 820am. Making me 1.5 hours late for work. Finally we were off and I was beyond frustrated with my morning. I mean come on I have a remote start and it didn't work and all 5 of us had to sit in the car waiting for it to thaw and thaw!
And then the Holy Spirit slapped me in the face (that's how I like to look at it)! I felt like God was saying "Really Mariana you are angry that your remote start didn't work and you had to wait for your car doors to thaw?"
I started thinking about all the people in other countries where it is cold and they have to walk and maybe not with even a warm coat. Then I thought about our own local homeless people. It was COLD out and they don't even have a warm place to lay down at night! I couldn't believe that I let a little thing like my car doors being frozen to complain about for as long as I did this morning. Don't get me wrong I am not saying that we cant have bad days and I am not saying that I felt like God was yelling at me because I don't believe that is how he works (although at times it is the only way we will listen). BUT I do believe that he was allowing the Holy Spirit to convict me right then on how I look at things.
So I decided to have a better day and realized that the kids and I had an extra 1.5 hours together this morning listening to Christmas music and laughing at how Issy says "Elephant" kinda sounds like "ELMOFIT" (as someone pointed out to me today) :)
So next time I have a bad day I am going to do my best to look at things differently and thank God for a new lesson to be learned!

Music

2011-11-26T13:43:00.002-05:00

I love music! When I was younger I loved Alternative and then R&B and then Rap and then back to Rock and then Country...ok I guess I loved it all! As I have gotten older and began my relationship with God my music choices have changed. Don't get me wrong I will totally play Biggie or Boys II Men or the Goo Goo Dolls but my first choice always goes back to Christian Rock. I think because when I was growing up I would turn to music that helped me get through things that I was dealing with or the perfect love song at the time. As I lean closer to God I am lifted and encouraged by the music that brings me to a place of peace. I love at church when I close my eyes and feel like it is just me and God a true time of worship...tears flowing but a smile on my face. Have you ever had that same experience maybe in the car or at home listening to worship music? I have and its amazing almost a little gift from God and always at the right time... I have posted videos on here in a while so I am going to try to post a couple songs that I love right now!

Friendship

2011-11-25T22:25:00.003-05:00

So I posted earlier about how thankful I was that God had brought me some amazing women that have walked along side of me and shown me what it means to have real godly friendships...

Leah P. who lives in California that I have never met is just one of them. It is totally God how he brought us together and I have faith that one day we will meet :) I had contacted her to talk to her about some things that I knew she was going through and really felt like God was telling me to tell her about my past and that he would use me to encourage her. I was nervous because how do you start a conversation with someone you have never met or even talked to and tell her that God told me to call her? The call I think lasted a couple of hours and was the start to an amazing friendship via phone calls, facebook, texting,letters (more her to me I am bad about writing letters lol) and emails! I can honestly say that only God can form such an amazing friendship between two women that have never met. I may have been an encouragement to her that night and months to follow but God has used her many times to encourage me as well. I really do believe that God would never allow our paths to cross if he never intended us to meet! I am truly thankful for her and I know that this is a friendship that will continue to grow until we are old :)

A couple of years ago I was co-leading a group for women who had been sexually/physically/emotionally/verbally abused and the leader was someone that is truly an amazing woman of God. For two years she told me that I had to get together with her sister because we were exactly alike and she knew that we would get along. Then just a year later I was approached to lead another group for college age women who had been abused and the co-leader was going to be Jenny S. (the sister to my friend) I was excited because her sister always talked so highly of her but was nervous that I would fall short some how. From that day on it was like looking in a mirror our personalities were so similar it was crazy. We both talk waaaayyy too much so our phone calls can last a really long time lol. We both have an amazing love for God and our kids drive us crazy. This past year we both had some really hard struggles and it would be easy to steer each other in the wrong direction instead we both continually steered each other back to God. I have never experienced a friendship with someone that has walked my life (a little different but very similar) and we both choose to be better than what has happened to us. I am so thankful that God put us in that group together because it was a start to a friendship that has grown so much in the last 5 years.

I really believe that yes we are to always go to him first (which I still have to remind myself or a certain friend does :) ) but I am amazed that he created us to be in fellowship with others. Jesus had his 12 disciples but he still had his close circle that he went to. Jesus had friends that he loved, that lifted him up in prayer and walked along side him. I am so blessed that God has given me lots of women..ones that pray for me and I for them and ones who are older that I can look to for wisdom and guidance and ones that are in my close circle that lift me up and steer me back to GOD!!

Turkey hangover

2011-11-25T08:58:00.002-05:00

I actually did not eat too bad but I still have that Turkey hangover feeling, you know where you slept so good that when you wake up your eyes burn and your hair is all over the place. I feel really bad that Nathan had to leave for work this morning at 615am hopefully it is not too crazy at the dealership.
So I was reading all my past blogs and I stopped in July of 2009! I have had a ton of things happen since then...Had a baby, found a new job, got promoted at new job, lost a friend (not to death), gained some amazing friends, and now moved. I really have so much to be thankful for because each of those things (and much more) have taught me more about life and myself.
The new baby of course is about to be 2 years old and has taught me the most. I may be crazy and my life may be crazy but when she starts dancing or telling me how pretty she is I can not help but look around and see how truly blessed I am to have such a crazy life :)
The new job is working for an amazing Chiropractor! I started there and then was promoted just months later and I love it. I love the people I work with and the patients are awesome! I can see this being the place that I retire from but that would mean the Dr. would still work there in his 90s lol
The part of loosing a friend was the hardest thing I went through :( it was not to death which is good but still was very hard. I think as I get older I realize what it really means to have friends and who those friends should be. Who do I want speaking into my life and who brings out what is best in me? Those are really hard questions to answer when you really care about people. Some things happened and when they did I needed to look at those questions and answer them honestly. It may sound really harsh like"oh if you cross Mariana she will cut you out" not true at all but I think we were bringing each other down and it was not healthy. Just as much my fault as hers. But that doesn't mean there were not some great times that as friends we shared and I do miss that part.
The part about gaining new friends is really all God. The cool thing is that some of them I already had a relationship with but once God showed me what it meant to be a good friend and what a real friend looked like I was blessed way more. I have some great friends that point me right back to God. Some that are not afraid to tell me that I am wrong and I am not afraid to tell them when they are. I love how God has used them to bless me and I know that I have returned the favor. Plus I have been in a bible study on Thursday nights and it has really been a blessing!
The move...well that has been harder to handle and harder to see the bigger picture. We could no longer afford where we were living and had to move :( I miss my Susilane Peeps and the house was a great house with lots of memories. Saab was not treating Nathan too well and was no longer getting the hours and since he worked on full commission it was really hard to make it. We are blessed and thankful that his parents not only have the room in their house but in their heart as well to allow us to move in with them. A family of 6 moving in with them is bound to create even more craziness than we already had :) Nathan has a new job and it really is a blessing from God!
So the last two years in a nutshell....I knew I would be happy to find this blog again! Happy turkey hangover everyone!!

I AM BACK

2011-11-23T23:40:00.002-05:00

After months of randomly trying to get back to blogging and being denied access because I forgot my password...I finally got in and I am so excited :)

I can not believe that the last time I posted a blog was in 2009! Wow have things changed but are also the same. So much to write but I feel the need to filter myself lately,which if you know me than you know that I NEVER filter myself. I have always been an open book, I have always believed that if you are open about what you are going through than it opens the door for others to be open and we stop walking around with plastic faces saying things like "I'm good", "I'm fine", "It's nothing" and my favorite (with a huge smile that I feel looks fake but seems to pass the test) "everything is great".

So how am I doing?

Well for know I am going to answer with I am fine until I am comfortable on here once again to blog my little heart out and not care who reads it or finds it offending or tries to use it against me ;) But I am back and it feels good so more posts about the craziness of my little Cathers Crew....

Stuff

2009-07-23T18:03:00.002-04:00

Lots has been going on as always in our crazy house!! Right now I am just counting the days until we find out if we are having a baby girl or a baby boy or who knows maybe an alien of some kind lol!! Next Wednesday we find out so 6 more days!! We have been busy going to parks and then trying to find things to do when it is raining so if anyone has any idea's please send them my way because as of right now it is messing up the house!!
We have a boy name picked out but are stuck on a girls first name middle name we picked out is Isabel after Nathan's grandmother but not sure what to go with it!! I need some help but they have to be unique I do not want a Jennifer or a Katie (not that anything is wrong if that is your name but I do not want 6 kids to raise their hands when my child's name is called!!) so please leave your suggestions!!!

I am still here

2009-07-05T19:36:00.002-04:00

I have been away for a while because I have been so sick that to even think about turning the computer on took too much energy! I have finally made the 12 week mark which is exciting. I have my next appointment on Tuesday and have to take all three kids (that will be very interesting). This week is going to be very busy Nathan's sister, brother-in-law, and two nieces are coming into town on Thursday. We are so excited to see them it has been a whole year. We are doing lots of fun stuff including a Thompson family reunion on Saturday, and Traverese City on Monday!!!

We went to Stoney Creek yesterday and had so much fun and lots of excitement. We started at one of the many picnic areas to grill and eat with the in-laws. The kids had lots of fun finding HUGE ants! Then around 8 pm we started the drive over to Baypointe Beach and we were stopped about 1 mile and told to park!! We knew that to carry chairs and 3 kids on the way back in the dark would be a bad idea so we decided to turn around. We then went to a different picnic area and let the kids play while we figured out what to do. A women started talking and saying that we could see the fireworks if we just walked about 5 minutes to the lake through the woods. So we waited until 955pm and started the walk (more than 5 minutes) with very tired kids and Nathan carrying all of our chairs (he would not let me help I asked). We found a spot after Mariana asking many times if there were any bears! Nathan and the girls spent the wait throwing lots of rocks in the lake. Then they started we seriously had the best spot in the whole park! We were right in front of where they light the fireworks off. It was so worth the hassle. THEN THE DRAMA BEGINS. I brought some crackers so that the kids could snack on something while we watched. A couple times Mariana dropped some so I threw them in the lake so I did not have Peanut Butter melting in my pocket. Well about 10 minutes in I saw them running all over the place. They were weaving in and out of the woods just a mere 5 feet behind us. That is right MICE!! I screamed put my feet up and had Mariana jump into my lap. Then more came and I said that's it we are done!! We packed up and started making our hike back (Sammy refusing to walk so Nathan had to carry him and the chairs) I had to calm the girls down and let them know that even though if was very dark out and we had no flashlight we were going the right way. We found our way back to the car and waited in line without moving for 45 minutes and made it home by 1230am!! It was so much fun though and we will do it again for sure but not without a grandparent coming to help lol!! Hope everyone else had a great 4th!!

I need to get back to the Hannah Montana Marathon with the girls!!

A poopy mess (Might be TMI)

2009-06-18T11:11:00.002-04:00

So this morning Sammy must have gone to the girls room first thing instead of ours and Mariana woke me up saying Sammy has no diaper on and he is poopy!! I jumped out of bed and grabbed him put him on his changing table to find his diaper at his knees and poop EVERYWHERE! When I pulled his pants off it then got all over the changing table his feet my hands. Then Sammy decided he wanted to touch it and sure enough he rubbed his hands all over his legs! This was definitely a GROSS moment.
I guess it is better than when Mariana used to paint her crib with her poop right??

Sleepy

2009-06-18T11:08:00.002-04:00

I am really sick of being sick and tired! I wake up and think about taking a nap then when I do get to take a nap and wake up from that I think about how soon I can go to bed! I know I know this is pregnancy and it will pass but seriously I feel like it is taking tooooooo long to pass this part of it all.

Today we are going to Westview Orchards they are having a family fun day where everything is free. And if you know Westview they can be very expensive so this is a treat! We are picking my mom up and she is going with us this afternoon. The kids are very excited as I am since it will pass the day until I can go to bed lol!!

Just looking back!!

2009-06-13T11:34:00.003-04:00

Jordan but OH MY do I look like I just gave birth lol!!

This is Mariana our miracle baby

First time seeing Sammy

A couple days old Salvatore Joseph

I can not believe that we are going to have another one!!!

Backyard Surprise (pics 3 of 3)

2009-06-13T11:25:00.005-04:00

The beginning of the surprise!
A couple hours in!!

5:30 pm
Around 7:30
14 hours later

The finished product
They were very Surprised!!
All three of them on the picnic table!!

Jordan's 7th Birthday (pics 2 of 3)

2009-06-13T11:20:00.002-04:00

Jordan opening her webkins

She loved her Razor Scooter

Has been wanting a new kite and she got it from Aunt Becky

Blowing our her candles I can not believe she is 7 years old!!

Mariana wanted some attention too! Middle child syndrome

Pictures 1 of 3

2009-06-13T11:06:00.005-04:00

It has been a long time since I have posted some pics so here are a couple hundred lol! Enjoy!!

Sammy on stage Mariana waiting for her turn to sing!!

Mariana and her diploma Jordan and Mariana waiting for the program to start

Jordan jumping on Uncle John's trampoline

Sammy at My Uncle Johns

Jordan's field trip to the Zoo

Our group by the Zoo fountain
Jordan waiting in line.

Can I blame it on the hormones??

2009-06-12T18:01:00.002-04:00

I am in a really bad B****Y mood! Like nothing is going to make it better. I spent the day outside with the kids which was lots of fun we took a walk and then they played in the back yard all day but for some reason I am letting some stuff bother me. One is that I just found out some stuff about a situation that I thought I was past and now I am just back to angry again.
This situation happened a while back and I wanted so bad to be off the hook for some things that I know I did not do and that those involved know I did not do but I felt that at the time I did not need to let everything out to prove that I was not wrong. Now things are coming up in me again that I wish I could just go to those people and let it all out.
But really what would that prove?
They already know that they were in the wrong and so do I.
So why am I dwelling on this again?
I know I am not perfect but I have always believed what goes around comes around so why can't it come around to them now in my timing lol???
I know that that is not a nice way to look at things and I am not saying I am wishing ill on others but just that they way they handled things will be found out.
Or maybe just an apology would be nice?
Maybe I just need to give it back to God and know that he will handle it all one day...........easier said than done though!

Have to spill the beans

2009-06-03T17:27:00.002-04:00

I hate to keep in secrets (about myself) I have such a hard time almost to the point that I feel like I am lying or just feel heavy. So I had to take a break because a couple of weeks ago we found out that we are ...................PREGNANT!! I know I know we are crazy fools that are very fertile!! We are over the shock of it all and very excited so are asking anyone who may have anything negative to think or say to keep it to themselves please.

At first I was pretty upset since I am not working now how would this work and since I could not get a hold of anyone I starting praying (shouldn't that be first) and I felt God reminding me that he is always with us and he got us through being pregnant with Sammy while separated for a few months a living in a two bedroom trailer. He has provided for us so many times when we were not sure how to make it.

Just the other day Nathan's dealership got the "your safe" letter which is God providing for us right now! We are finally good right now and I know that he will continue to provide everything we need.

My first appointment is on the 9th but I am positive I am pretty close to three months along and have this weird feeling it could be twins! Could be totally wrong and I hope I am but it is all in God's hands. I have been really sick from 5 am til around midnight so please keep me in your prayers since I also have to chase after the little two year old who gets into everything!!

I know I know

2009-06-02T09:39:00.004-04:00

So I said I was going to take a little break but that is like someone telling me I can not talk and if you know me well that is impossible lol!! I have gone longer than this without posting but that was not consciously and well this is and it is really hard. A lot is going on and keeping us really busy so soon I will reveal it all to you guys :)!!! Have a great week all!

P.s. Pray for my husband this weekend he is putting a swing set together and though I know he can do it I know that there will many words coming from the backyard that I will not be able to repeat lol!!

Need to take a break

2009-05-25T17:48:00.004-04:00

Well things are CRAZY! They always are around the Cather's house. I feel like things always are with me like God is always trying to get my attention and say "see I am here and know what I am doing"! Well this weekend that happened which means for the next couple of weeks I have to look to him. We had something major happen this weekend and I tried calling a couple of people to talk to them but no one answered. Does that ever happen to you? I felt like God was trying to tell me that I needed to come to him first. So I did I prayed and prayed about the situation and he brought scripture to mind that calmed me then LBs phone finally worked and we talked. She told me everything that an amazing friend would (and my husband already told me but we all know that we take advice better from our good girlfriends lol) and even had me laughing at the end of the conversation. I know that God has the blue prints for our life already and they are better than anything that we ourselves could even dream of planning. I just have to remember that what ever he puts in our lives to trust that he knows what he is doing (I believe many times I have thought I could have done it better lol) and that he will never leave us alone. That is what I think I miss that he is always with us. A couple of weeks ago our kids in church got some neon shoelaces to put in their shoes to remind them that if they thought that they were alone standing up for something that they believed in then they were to look down at those and know that God is with them. I think I need to ask Brenda if I can have some!!! I might take a couple weeks off from blogging then I will be back and explain all of this madness when I can!!

Sorry

2009-05-16T20:07:00.000-04:00

Well I just finished moving all my blog entries from my old myspace blog to here and it took me a really long time. Funny thing is Nathan called me because he kept getting all of them emailed to his phone lol!! So sorry to all of you who are on my automatic email because I think you probably got at least 30 emails from me!!

I did this because I had to delete my myspace page but I would loose all of my blogs and there are too many memories there to just delete them. Well they are here incase you did not read them then so you can go back ENJOY!!!

Books

2009-05-12T12:00:00.003-04:00

So I have been reading a lot lately. When I say a lot I mean like in one week I read 4 books and started the 5th!! I love reading so much and right now I am reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan which is amazing. I love watching the chapter videos on www.crazylovebook.com but the book is bringing me into a new awareness of God's love for me and how much in awe I am of him and what he is. I have had a couple of days kid free and today and tomorrow are my last two and I have made a commitment to not turn the TV on and just read and pray. I have stuck to that I read the bible, Crazy Love and then write in my journal and just pray sitting in God's presence. It has helped me so much with things that are going on right now. God has given me so much clarity in some of these issues and it feels so good to be going down the right path now.I feel like God has used this time for me to focus on him and grow. I just struggle now to find the time when the kids are home with me and that is going to be everyday come Thursday. Well I know that God will work it out.
Speaking of reading I am going to go outside and enjoy this weather and read!!!

Music

2009-05-12T11:40:00.003-04:00

Well music has played a huge role in my life I literally would lock myself in my room for hours and just listen to music. I would record songs write all the lyrics down memorize them and pick them apart until I understood the meaning of them. I would always listen to songs that would relate to what I was going through like when I was depressed I would listen to songs that I would just cry and cry but when I was happy I would listen to upbeat music and sing at the top of my lungs and dance around. Whenever I needed a break of any kind music was there for me. When I first started looking for a church music was huge I visited some churches that were too much and some that literally there was no sound to drown out my horrible attempt at singing. When I walked into Rockpointe almost 8 years ago there were many things that just made me feel at peace (the holy spirit, the community, the feeling of come as you are) but the music drew me in. At first people raising their hands to sing freaked me out but I liked that there were some people that did not do that and some people who clapped and some who did not. I will never forget the first song I ever sang there it was:
EVERY MOVE I MAKE
Every move I make, I make in You You make me move, Jesus.Every breath I take, I breathe in You.Every step I take, I take in You You are my way, Jesus.Every breath I take, I breathe in You.
Waves of mercy, waves of grace Everywhere I look, I see Your face Your love has captured me.
O my God, this love, how can it be?

Every time I hear it it reminds me of that first day that I really felt Jesus welcoming me into his family. I was saved years before that but this was the first time that I had hope that I would know Jesus the way I read. I started buying Christian Cds and only listening to that music because it brought me up never did it bring me down and when I was sad I would listen to it and immediately I would feel Gods presence. I am now one of those that raises their hands in church and claps their hands but not to make a statement but because I can relate to the words that I am singing and I love to worship God.
All this to say that a while ago Nathan got an MP3 player and I have tried over and over to get some christian songs on there are have not found a good site to get them from. Today I did!!! I am so excited I am going to go for a walk right now and listen to all my songs that I just downloaded on Walmart's Mp3 site with a gift card I got a while ago!!!

My Weekend

2009-05-11T15:09:00.003-04:00

This weekend was great. As with my birthday I always stretch it for at least 2 weeks (I try a month but it doesn't always work) this year I had a Mother's Day Weekend! On Saturday I did the MS walk (3.2 Miles) with my cousins and it was a blast. I raised $200.00 which was pretty good but my cousin Kim raised $860 on her own!!! The coolest part was there was supposed to be 6 of us raising our goal of $1000 but two of us did it and beat our goal $1060!! I have to say that I am now looking forward to the 5k run for Breast Cancer. I have been walking 2.5-3 miles with Nathan and am going to start running it with in the next week to get ready. This will be my third time doing this race. The last time was I think two years before Jordan was born so it has been a while. I love running and am excited to be back outside and have my thoughts to sort through. Anyways when I got home Nathan let me take a nap ( I was up at 5am to get to Frankenmuth by 8am) and then he made an amazing dinner. Chicken Kabobs and seriously they were the best yet. Then he helped get the kids to bed and we had a really relaxing evening together.
Sunday was great I got to sleep in and everyone made me some pancakes and brought them to my room (Sammy ended up digging in and destroying them with his hands but that is okay). It was very sweet and the girls talked about it all day. We then went to my Nana and Papa's house for a BIG BBQ that my Cousin Kim always puts on for the Moms. She did great she made sure that everything that we ate was gluten free so that my Nana did not feel left out and then she gave us all Canvas shopping bags with seeds (oregano for me), a reusable water bottle, and a Going Green for Dummies book. It was so much fun. We got home and Nathan cleaned the kitchen and the bathroom for me!! It was so great and I do have to say that I am very lucky that I have a husband who humors me when I stretch out my special holidays and goes along with it. Because he knows that I would laugh if he tried to stretch his out lol!!!

DaZeD

2009-05-07T23:45:00.003-04:00

I am in a little bit of a daze. I need to bring myself back in to full time mommy mode and it is a struggle for me. I know that this is where i am supposed to be because I see where the need is right now especially with my middle. She is struggling with numerous things and I need to take a delicate but firm approach and I have a feeling that this summer is going to be challenging. I think I need to start with spending some time with her in the bible and reading to her and having her memorize a easy verse with me. I think that this will help her she loves God already and she goes around the house singing songs about God all the time. She is the typical middle child I think and I am that as well I always said growing up that I will show favor to my middle because I was so deprived (ha ha ha ha). I feel bad because my oldest gets attention since she is in school now bringing big things home and doing concerts and field trips and Sammy is so jealous whenever the girls even try to come close to me that I feel like Mariana gets lost. I work really hard to make sure obviously that she does not but I feel like I am failing her some how. I know before I have said that no matter what we do we must all face the truth that someday our kids are all going to need therapy but I would rather it be because of Nathan and not me JUST JOKING!!!!
Well on another note thank you to those that donated because now we have almost $600 and that is a lot closer than we were. GO TEAM TAG GIRLS (even if it is just two of us now)!!!!

More Begging

2009-05-06T10:57:00.005-04:00

Please if you can click on the title above it will take you to our team site and donate money to the MS Foundation. My goal was $500 and I have $125 I have tried really hard to collect as much as I could including hand writing(because I do not have a printer) some flyers and placing them around my neighborhood. I really would like to do this. My cousin and I are doing the walk on Saturday so this is my last chance to raise the money. You can go to the site that is listed above or you can email me at cathersmariana@comcast.net and I will send my address and info to you so you can mail a check in. Thank you so much and please please please help out. As you can see I am not above begging!!!!!

2009-05-06T10:57:00.001-04:00

Small Glimpses

2009-05-05T12:59:00.003-04:00

Well as always lots has happened and I am not wanting to go into all the details of the mess that followed quiting my job and the emotional mess that I became but know that things are getting better. I took all the kids to school today (because I already gave a two week notice to daycare so why not give myself a break before the summer right??) and came home and started reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan. I then had to go pick up my Little sister and ended up praying in the car before getting her and just in tears while praying. I came home and spent over an hour reading the bible and praying. I want to get back to having an amazing relationship with God again. I miss who I used to be and I a excited to get glimpses of me. I plan on taking the two days this week and the two next week just in God's presence no TV just reading the bible, praying and journaling (blogging too). I know that this will help me to get myself on track. I am excited for things that are coming our way. We started our small group on Sunday and I am really excited for this and the relationships that will come of it.

On Sunday Pastor Randy was talking about how we forget that our identity is in Christ not in our roles as a wife,mother,coworker and though I know that a lot of people can relate to this but I felt like Randy was talking to me directly. This is something that I struggled with at work especially with everything that has recently happened. I think that God the last couple of days has reminded me of this that not only is my identity in him, but my reputation will be protected and the truth always comes out. I also know that even though I know that things will come out it will be in his timing and may not look like I think it will. I am just so excited for this change that is going on.

Being able to to handle the unexpected

2009-04-30T11:43:00.002-04:00

Well today is my first day home with the kids! I am trying to keep us busy so that I do not dwell on the other things that are going on in my life but God always comes through and brings a little smile to me. We decided to go outside before it started raining so I put the two little ones in the wagon and went for a walk around the block. Well we went half way and started raining so I turned around went home walked up to the front door and even tough I left our front door unlocked I did not unlock the screen door (which has no key)! So here we are in the rain can't go anywhere but sit in the car because my car keys are in the house with my house keys! But if you know me then you know that I love the rain so it was nice to sit in the car and just watch the rain come down. I could have gotten upset cried (some more than I have already been) but instead we waited til it stopped raining. Here is the funny part............I thought hmmmm maybe for some odd reason the kitchen window is unlocked and I can climb through. So I left the kids in the car and ran around the back and low and behold it was unlocked. So I grabbed a patio chair and climb head first through the kitchen window. I am positive that my neighbors behind me were wondering what I was doing. So we are back in the house the kids are waiting lunch and soon it will be Sam's nap time. So I guess all the funny things that I used to post about our funny family drama will return now that I am home again. Have a great day all!!!

2009-04-29T22:55:00.002-04:00

I just want to say thank you to those that have helped me tonite. I am just wondering why this is happening and I just have to trust that God has a plan and that I am protected from some of the things that are being said. I know that things will work out. And now I need to move on to spend the summer home with my kids and have a great summer getting together for play dates with friends and finding myself in God again. And maybe more time to get back to blogging again YAY!!!!

2009-04-24T16:04:00.002-04:00

I am so excited because Nathan and I were invited into one of our church groups. I am really excited because we really need to back involved in fellowship. I can not wait to start the group in just a couple of weeks.

Not to be a Pain

2009-04-23T14:28:00.004-04:00

Please if you read this and would like to help my cousins and I out we are trying to donate $1000.00 to MS. We are doing a walk on May 9th in Frankenmuth. Our Aunt has MS and I know that this means alot to her. I know that times are hard but even if you just give up one coffee or bottled water (plus it is good for earth week too) this week that would help. Send me an email if you are unable to donate on line and would like to send me a donation through the mail I will mail you a tax deduction form back. Thank you so much and let everyone you know to check out our Team Tag Page (our families last name is Tagliavia) Click on the title of this blog entry to get to our page!!!

Another Deep Entry

2009-04-20T15:54:00.002-04:00

Today is a raining gloomy day inside and I feel that way myself. I love having a blog but lately I have not posted things because if certain people are reading it then I have to watch myself and that is really hard to do. Not that I do not want people to read it but any ways. I am feeling really crappy! I feel like I am following God and am where I am supposed to be but I feel like there is something I am missing ya know? I know for a fact that my life is filled with busyness that does at times include him I hate admitting it but better to be honest right? I feel like I am lacking very much with my relationship with God. Just a couple of years ago I was in awe and in love with God I had this amazing relationship where I would sit for hours seriously and pray and write in my prayer journal. I go back and read these and it brings me to tears knowing that I have lost that. I know it is there but what happened? (rhetorical questions people?) I miss him in my life like it was then I know all I have to do is get on my knees and he is there. There are some things going on in my life right now that I feel like I am supposed to still be involved in but I am uneasy all the time and questioning if I should be. I feel like if I stop what I am doing then I am being irresponsible to my family. But should I continue doing something that makes who God created me to be not there anymore? Or am I not submitting enough to him or looking to others to provide the fill I should be getting from him? I am confused and feeling a little alone right now? But I am reminded of a family summit with my kids at my church a couple of weeks ago where they all got shoe laces and where told to put them in their shoes and whenever they felt like they were alone in something that they just needed to look down and remember that they are never alone. I need to remember that no matter what God is with me even when I do not feel like he is!!

2009-04-15T12:16:00.002-04:00

Not sure how to title this one....it has been a while since I have blogged. I am in one of those moods you know where you just feel like you are going through the motions. Things are really busy at work and at home. Sammy just turned two which is CRAZY! We have had birthday parties every weekend sometimes two a day and have three more this month. But it is a fun crazy. I am at work taking a break from the craziness and I feel like I want to blog about something but I am worried someone will read it that can not. I will just say that someone who is in my life now is bringing back memories from my past that scare me. It is not that this person is bad it is just that this persons paths have crossed that of someone who really caused serious harm to me in the past. Lately I have been dealing with this in different situations and it makes me question have I moved past this issue?? Is it normal to know that you have forgiven someone and moved on but then years later to deal with emotions again? Then I wonder if I am even questioning is that God telling me that I have unresolved issues? Or if you are someone who has been abused do you always have issues with it? Like certain smells or names or places bring it back? I have always struggled with nightmares and sometimes they are more intense then others and lately they are strong where I wake up and feel like I have not even slept. Hmmmmmmm
On another note our church is starting some new small groups called Pathways and we are really excited about joining a group soon. It makes me nervous though because we signed up to be invited into a group which makes me think of Gym in elementary school and being the last couple picked lol!! Seriously though I know that God will provide a group for us that will give us the chance to meet new people and be encouraged and encourage others. I am really excited for this. Maybe I should go back to work now..............

MS Walk

2009-03-27T20:19:00.002-04:00

Hey everyone! Thanks to everyone who prayed for Sammy he is doing really good and I can not believe he will be 2 in just a couple of weeks!! My cousins and I have been trying to think of ways that we could get together and spend some time together. If you know our family then you know that we are the typical Italian family (or used to be) Our whole family would go to my Nana and Papa's for Homemade pasta every Sunday. Now that we are all older and have our own families (and Nana and Papa have moved into a smaller house) we don't get together but for holidays and Birthdays (which in our family is a lot actually haha). So We have decided to help the cure for MS (my Aunt Beth has struggled with MS for I think close to 10 years) we created our own team "Team Tag Girls" (Tagliavia is our family name). Please if you can we are going to Frankenmuth on May 9th for the walk and we need all the support we can get. Believe me I know how hard times are but even if everyone we know donates a dollar imagine how much we can raise for a cure!! Please follow the link above or copy and paste it to your browser and check out our page!! If you really are not able to donate then keep us in your prayers and those that struggle with this horrible Illness!!!!!

Anoyone looking for a job!!!

2009-03-17T12:22:00.001-04:00

The company I work for in Clinton Township uses a Computer tech company and they are looking for a full time receptionist who has lots of experience with quick books. They are looking for someone to start asap. Please let me know if you are interested I think it is a really good opportunity.

Life

2009-03-11T00:42:00.002-04:00

******WARNING I COULD NOT USE SPELL CHECK SO THERE ARE MANY MISTAKES PLEASE DO NOT PROOF READ*********

So it has been a while since I have written on here. I have no time right now for the things that I used to do for me (which is fine for the moment) case in pointe I am doing this from the pediatric unit at Troy Beaumont. I bet you all can guess what little one I am with. Sammy is here because he pnemonia. He has been really sick with all respiratory illnesses since Janurary and this one landed him in the hospital. He has been such a trooper though and he brought Elmo along for the ride. Everytime he had to have a breathing treatment Elmo got one too, and when he was mad and ripped his IV out and had to be taken away to get a new one, you guessed it Elmo went too!! Although he is sick he is still such a joy and I can not believe that he is going to be 2 years old soon.
Mariana is doing well she is now 5 and very proud that she can write her name that she does it all over the place. She cracks me up with the things she comes up with and she continues to amaze me everyday with how smart she is.
Jordan is doing amazing in 1st grade. She is reading a ton which is great and she is showing inerest in Art which is pretty cool! She is still my little mommy and spoils Sammy a ton. Se finally lost her first tooth a couple of weeks back and now has two more loose so she is alread thinking of questions to ask the tooth fairy.
Nathan is doing good a work God has been faithful. We thank him everyday that Nathan still has a job because the way things are going it could be any day with SAAB.
I am loving my job and all the stress that goes with it. They have been really understanding with Sam always being sick and even let me go in after hours to work so that I can be at home or at the hospital if I need to. God has really blessed me with a new friend there and we are able to help eachother get through the crazy days.
We are still renting in Roseville and seriously I don't think we will ever go back to owning our own home this has been great. Plus we would never find as a great of neighbors that we have now!!
Well hopefully I can continue blogging if things get less crazier around here.

My Husband

2009-02-04T16:19:00.005-05:00

I just wanted to let everyone know that I have an amazing husband! He wrote me a really sweet love letter today and I hope everyone is JEALOUS! lol!! This is my birthday week so he is so great with that sending me things and telling me great things all week.

On another note if anyone knows anybody that is looking for summer work I need to look for a sitter for 3 days a week for my three kids (possibly just the two little ones) I am willing to pay a decent amount that I have yet to figure out. Please spread the word to someone who is trust worthy and reliable. Thanks

Another Movie Night

2009-02-01T01:04:00.001-05:00

So it has been a while since I have been so touched by a movie that I had to blog about it. Last night I stayed up until 3am to watch the movie Fireproof (Nathan ended up falling asleep). I cried, no actually I sobbed during the last 10 minutes of the movie. It was amazing I would highly recommend everyone to see it. Whether you are a believer or not, single, married, divorced, have a great marriage or a scarred one this will in some way touch you. Get past the corny acting in the beginning and really pay attention to the story behind the story.

Many of you already know that Nathan and I went through some really hard times in our own marriage and even separated (were very close to a divorce) when I was pregnant with Sammy and that is what it took to bring Nathan to turn to God and really give up his addictions and his demons so that he could focus on being a husband. But I also had to remember that God gives me chance after chance and still loves me and I needed to do the same for my husband. It took a long time but we are finally at a point that we can really confide in each other and have a very happy marriage. All because of God!

Watching this movie was like watching our fights right in front of us. Nathan and I watched it together again tonight and it affected me just the same. Amazed at what God can do because I wasn't only watching a movie I was watching what my life was and how God had changed it. All we had to do was give our life to him, trust him, and continue to confide in him. Some people may think that, that is serving a demanding God but if you have lived a life of fear,guilt,shame,addiction,sadness,lies,and defeat than it is easy.

Here is a link to the Love Dare book that is featured in the movie and the Fireproof my marriage website.

GOD BLESS!!

http://thelovedarebook.com/

http://www.fireproofmymarriage.com/

Mom's are the best

2009-01-28T09:23:00.003-05:00

A friend of mine sent this email to me and I had to post it. I was crying by then end of it thinking of my mom and Nana! Thank you Mom for being so great and for teaching me how to be a great Mom. Although my Nana will not read this I thank her for being a strong,beautiful,loving and encouraging women for me to look to and admire.

MOTHERS

Real Mothers don't eat quiche;
they don't have time to make it.
Real Mothers know that their kitchen utensils
are probably in the sandbox.
Real Mothers often have sticky floors,
filthy ovens and happy kids.
Real Mothers know that dried play dough
doesn't come out of carpets.
Real Mothers don't want to know what
the vacuum just sucked up.
Real Mothers sometimes ask 'Why me?'
and get their answer when a little voice says, 'Because I love you best.'
Real Mothers know that a child's growth
is not measured by height or years or grade...
It is marked by the progression of Mommy to Mom to Mother...

The Images of Mother

4 YEARS OF AGE - My Mommy can do anything!
8 YEARS OF AGE - My Mom knows a lot! A whole lot!
12 YEARS OF AGE - My Mother doesn't really know quite everything.
14 YEARS OF AGE - Naturally, Mother doesn't know that, either.
16 YEARS OF AGE - Mother? She's hopelessly old-fashioned..
18 YEARS OF AGE - That old woman? She's way out of date!
25 YEARS OF AGE - Well, she might know a little bit about it!
35 YEARS OF AGE - Before we decide, let's get Mom's opinion .
45 YEARS OF AGE - Wonder what Mom would have thought about it?
65 YEARS OF AGE - Wish I could talk it over with Mom.

The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair.

The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes,
because that is the doorway to her heart,
the place where love resides.

The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mole,
but true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul.
It is the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she shows, and the beauty of a woman with passing years only grows!

Blah Blah Blah

2009-01-21T11:28:00.002-05:00

This past week has been really rough. I am not going to go into the details but for all that happened bad I am hoping that I have lost a ton of weight because each time I worked out it was to get some major aggression out! It was a week of one thing after another and having to face my fears BIG TIME! One thing at the end of the weekend Sammy flushed a big comb down the toilet Nathan is at work and I am home by myself with three kids and the basement is flooding and the plunger is not working. I had to use this snake thing (which was in a closet in the basement surrounded by spiders AHHHHHH) and still did not work. Finally when Nathan got home he fixed my handyman! Then last night I am getting Sammy in the tub and out of no where he throws a ball down the toilet! He is so fast I swear I did not even have my head turned long enough to turn the hot water on. It is funny because he reminds me a lot of how my brother was I guess he is a typical boy. Maybe soon I will have enough guts to tell everyone about the other fears I had to face but not right now! Have a great day!

Weight Loss Update

2009-01-15T08:50:00.000-05:00

Hey everyone I just wanted to update everyone on my progress. I am amazing myself really on how determined I am to change my lifestyle from what it was to be healthy. I am working really hard! I have cut out all coffee and pop and seriously I am drinking like 100 Oz's of water a day which really is not that hard because with this weather I am always thirsty. Plus I am working out every night doing an aerobic exercise that is the same as walking 2 miles. So all that has helped me to loose 10 POUNDS since new years day!!!!! I am so excited that I am totally going to not only win this competition but do it in a healthy way and keep the weight off! Thanks for all your prayers and I will keep you all updated!

Little Miss Mya's Giveaway

2009-01-14T09:02:00.002-05:00

You all have to check this giveaway out. My friend Lisabeth is giving this great package away. All you need to do is click on the link below and follow the rules on her blog to be entered to win! If you don't have a blog still go check it out and you can spread the word about this new place for little girls. I am entering Mariana to win for a little Birthday party for her.
http://queenconger.blogspot.com/2009/01/little-miss-myas-review-and-giveaway.html

Calling all Cooks

2009-01-09T11:09:00.002-05:00

Ok I am looking for some different (Healthy) recipes. We only eat Chicken and Turkey Meat so please if you have any good and healthy recipes pass them on to me. If we are going to stick to this lifestyle we need variety and I only have so many recipes that I can use. I have gone online and gotten some really good ones but it always better when I know someone else had cooked something that they love too! Have a great weekend everyone!

Progress

2009-01-08T09:20:00.002-05:00

Thanks to everyone that emailed me really nice and encouraging comments about sticking to my diet! I am really excited to say that I have already lost 2lbs! I only weigh myself once a week and I did last night and was so excited. I am really trying hard. I have been doing 2 miles a night with this aerobics workout and I feel really good. So keep praying for us! Nathan is doing good too he is actually eating whole wheat which he swore he never would. Hope everyone has a great week!

New Year

2009-01-06T15:02:00.002-05:00

I have to say that I am excited for this year! I am making a commitment this year that is really hard for me to talk about but here it is..............losing 50lbs! WOW I can not believe I just told everyone that. I am really excited though because I have been carrying this weight for too long. I am not in denial most of it is from my three kids but the other is from bad eating habits. For too long I ate out of convenience. Working and having three kids and keeping up a house was just too hard to cook healthy meals too. My first goal is 30 lbs by April 1st. Nathan and I are doing it together we are competing against a friend of his from work and his fiance. We are going to SMOKE them!! We are working out together and I am cooking healthy meals and watching how much I eat. I have been doing really good and I am so excited. The hard thing for me is sticking to it so I am just giving this to God I want to be healthy for my kids and grand kids. The next big thing is I am going to quit smoking. Some of you might either be surprised that I am smoking again or that I have ever even smoked but I am back to smoking a lot and I need to quit. My goal is in April I will start to quit smoking I can not do both at the same time because right now when I am stressed I either eat or smoke so to cut both out is too much. I am trying to be realistic and not mess my self up. So pray for me that I am able to stick to this and work towards my goal. My plan is once I am back in shape to start running again and participate in the Breast Cancer 5k run in August again. I love running and I am determined to meet these goals.
I hope that you all are having a great New year as well!

MOODY

2008-12-17T12:50:00.003-05:00

It has been awhile since I last posted. We have been really busy. Either with the Flu that just won't go away or family gatherings. We literally have a family gathering for the next 4 weeks STRAIGHT!!! Every Saturday and every Sunday. CRAZINESS! I am in one of "those" Moods today. I have been dragged into the middle of something that has made my stomach in knots for the past well actually the past week. I hate drama and I know some of you will laugh because sometimes my life is full of it but this drama is different. It is something that does not or should not have to do with me but because someone else decided to bring me in on it I am wrapped up in it. Why is it I can't just let it go and give over the situation to God? I always struggle with this and I don't know why???? Anyways if I do not get a chance to come back on here before Christmas I wish everyone a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Oh and Nathan and I won tickets to a Pistons game on New Years Eve so this will be the first one in like 5 years that we have gone out so we are very excited. A fully paid for date and great seats by the way!!

My Godson

2008-11-29T15:46:00.003-05:00

I love being a Zia and I love love love my Godson Nolan. He is so adorable I know I am a little bias so you guys can be the judge. Enjoy the pics!!

He is sooo sooo cute!!!!!!!

I think I owe a BIG Thank you to Rachel and Tom for this hat! It is a MSU hat and my sister and her husband are big U of M fans so this is payback for all the outfits for my kids lol!!

So Handsome!!

At his Baptism!

He is such a ham already!

Always have to sneak in one of my kids into the mix!!

COFFEE

2008-11-25T02:04:00.002-05:00

So I need help getting off of coffee lol!! No I am serious I think I had too much tonight and I always said that it never affected me at night but if you see what time I am posting this blog you will notice that it DOES effect me. It is 2am and I have to be in 4 hours for work and I can not stop!!! Seriously I am out of control I have been surfing the net for like (does anyone even say that any more "surfing the net") 3 hours no joke. PLEASE HELP ME!!!

A mean and Nasty BUG

2008-11-24T22:38:00.002-05:00

NO this is not another post about bugs well at least the creepy crawly kind anyways! My weekend was rated as one of the worst. I know I always have drama but I promise it is not brought on by me. Thursday afternoon Sammy started throwing up at my Mother-in-laws house and then Jordan started at 230 in the morning. I started at 6am and things got worse from there. Nathan was not allowed to leave work to come home and help me with the two sick kids and myself (not to mention a very hyper Mariana who was not sick.). Once Nathan got home from work at 730pm he started cleaning while Sam and I slept the evening away. Sammy kept me up all night moving all around moaning in his sleep. Saturday morning I woke up feeling pretty good and Jordan (as she said) WAS ALL BETTER. Sammy on the other hand spiked a fever and slept from 10pm the night before and did not wake up (but a few times to drink some water) until Saturday evening. At around 5pm Saturday things seemed to be getting better I was praising God that Mariana and Nathan had not gotten sick and Sammy finally ate something and kept it down. Well I should always know not to speak too soon because Mariana started getting sick all over her bedroom. About an hour later I started AGAIN!!! I was in the bathroom all night and no joke it was like the Exorcist. I slept all Sunday and finally ate some homemade soup (that by the way my wonderful husband made with my instruction of course lol) and prayed that I would make it to work on Monday. Well this morning came and I was unable to eat much but a small bowl of soup but I made it to work but much to my surprise my husband did not. Nathan was here all alone getting REALLY sick all day. All we can do is Praise God that all of us did not have it at the same time. I am very thankful that I have a husband who would literally clean all day and into the late late late nights to keep the germs from spreading..........oh wait all that and he still got sick!! I am praying that since we have already had the Flu bug that this Christmas will be the first without it!!

Christmas Time

2008-11-19T23:37:00.003-05:00

I have to say that this is the first year that I was actually really excited to start listening to Christmas music. So on my way to work the other day I put 100.3 on and this song by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra came on and I cried! It is so beautiful you have to listen to it!!!

No title

2008-11-14T22:50:00.003-05:00

I always say this before I write a blog that I know might be one that a lot of you may totally disagree with me on but remember this is MY blog and you can close it if you don't like it!!
Also I do not have great writing skills or grammer skills so please do not get out the red marker!!

I have been watching 20/20 tonight and it has kind of affected me a little. I am not really sure how I am feeling but it has just brought up questions in me but also some sadness. In case you did not see it the show was a special on "The Pregnant Man" . I have heard so many people say some pretty horrible things about this man and his wife and the choices that they have made to have a family. This all as you know really (even though I do not know this person) hurts me like really hurts me so much that I am almost crying while typing this. I really get angry at people who judge and make horrible comments about others. Every time I seen this couple on TV all I saw was a happy and very much in love couple. They both were glowing and just full of smiles. I can not believe the horrible messages and letters that they receive from people, people that share the same faith as me. It really sickens me that some one who says they have a heart for God and HIS people and then they turn around and call a complete stranger and leave a message saying in a voice full of hatred and anger "God does not make mistakes" and (paraphrasing here) you are evil and I hope your child gets taken away.

My best friend Lisabeth (I hope you don't mind me saying this) but when I first met her it was at a church group that her and her husband Jon led and I was giving my testimony. She came right up to me and said don't worry I have gone through some things in my life too and you will do fine. A couple months later she started working at Handprints as the lead teacher in the walker room and I was the lead teacher in the infant room. After one of our open houses we realized that we would both be going to California with Celebrate Recovery to Saddleback Church and we started talking. She started talking about how her family and how she has an older sister and a younger sister that is going through the transition to be a man soon. I will tell you honestly that I was caught a little off guard only because I have never known anyone who has been through this or even someone who knew someone who has been through this. Lisabeth though made it seem like no big deal. As we became closer and I listened to her talk about her brother I could tell how much she loved him and how accepting she was of him making this choice to do something to finally make him what he truly believes he was supposed to be. I have to say I am still torn because I do not get it but I will never ever HATE someone because of it. Lisabeth has taught me so much with issues like this because I do not have to agree or understand I just have to love them. I do not need to preach to them or shove God down their throat I just need to love and accept them and maybe they will see that ,here is one more person who has a heart for God but also loves me.

What if we all did that? What if we all loved them and accepted them? What if all of us that say that we love God show that to others that maybe we do not agree with their lifestyle? What if we see them as people and not as "THEM" or "THOSE PEOPLE"???? That is the kind of world I want to live in!

Again you may not agree with me or even question my walk with God or my faith but honestly I do not care because I only answer to one person and that is my Heavenly Father not YOU!!!

Thanksgiving

2008-11-13T21:09:00.002-05:00

I am very excited because this Saturday (before my jewelry Party) we are having Thanksgiving Dinner with Nathan's family. His parents every year go to his sister's house in North Carolina so we do Dinner early. I am in charge of making the Green Bean Casserole which is fine with me. It is going to be one of those crazy weekends but I am excited! Nathan and my brother are taking the girls to go see the new Madagascar movie on Sunday after Church so Sam and I will have a lazy afternoon probably sleeping on the couch!! Have a great weekend everyone!! And if you have no plans come hang out with me on Saturday night!!!

It is not too late

2008-11-08T12:39:00.003-05:00

As you know I lost our camera and so I am just now able to post some pics of Halloween so enjoy!!

Please Pray

2008-11-08T12:34:00.002-05:00

My little sister Jessica 18 was in a car accident last night. She was speeding through my moms neighborhood and crashed into a house! Luckily no one was seriously injured in the home. Jessica was injured though and has been in the hospital. They are almost positive that she has a fractured neck and possible some internal injuries. Just pray that she recovers quickly and that her spirit is not too broken. I am praying that she learns from her mistakes and realizes how serious driving is and that it is not to be taken lightly and she could have killed someone or herself!

President Obama

2008-11-06T23:05:00.003-05:00

I know I am a little late blogging about this but it is still fresh on my heart. I have to say that I was very emotional all Tuesday night. As I said before I love to Vote! I feel so blessed to live in a Country where we have freedom and where we get the chance to vote for who runs our Country. If you read my blog then you read the entry that I posted after the Democratic National Convention about how after watching it I knew that Obama was going to be our next President. There was just something about him and what he stood for that made me think. This came to a big surprise to me considering I have always been very much a conservative. His speech started to bring up feelings of really wanting change. I had so many people though that I felt like if they knew that I voted for him would question my faith. I struggled with this and thought God does not say anywhere in the Bible that we are to vote Republican. In fact he created our Country to have the freedom to choose who we felt would make the best decisions right? I went and voted at Bethany Lutheran Church first thing Tuesday morning sure of who I was going to vote for and was very proud that I was making my decision based on all the research I did and checking a site that a friend had given me to rule out all the rumors that were swirling around.
I planned on staying up late to see who was going to win and I have to say that I was not surprised. I also have to say that it was a very emotional win! I (if you do not know already) am a White Female so I will never understand what anyone who is African American goes through on a daily basis but I just kept thinking WOW it must be so amazing to see some one of your race become President. I have to say (it saddens me that I even know people who would say this) I heard a lot that Oh every person who is black is going to register so that a black man can become President! That sickens me and what is cool is that more White Americans voted for him than anyone else. I kept thinking wow look at all of these young kids who have been given hope not only African American but Asian,Mexican,Indian that they too can one day be President!!
The best about this is that look how many people did not look at President Obama's skin color but saw what he could do for our Country. I really hope that those that did not vote for him will at least respect him and I really hope that this starts our Country down the path of getting rid of Racism once and for all!! God created all of us and we are all his children and any disrespect to any of his children is disrespecting him. So now we all have to keep President Obama and his family in our prayers that he makes wise choices and keeps his promises and that his family is protected from harm. We also should pray for our Country that people start to see people and not color!

Party Time

2008-11-06T18:51:00.006-05:00

Hey Everyone! If you did not receive an Evite from me it is probably because I do not have your email! If you want come out for a kid free night click on the link below and come over for a Jewelry Part at my house Next Saturday! I have been trying to figure out a way to get all the girls together and I thought with the Holidays coming up this would be a perfect way to buy gifts! Even if you can not afford it or have too much Jewelry come any way!! Copy and Paste the URL to view the Evite!!
http://www.evite.com/pages/invite/viewInvite.jsp?event=RRKAKICYUXVDJYDFRQMX

What an Awesome God We Have

2008-10-31T02:01:00.004-04:00

I have not had much time to come on here so I apologize for not responding to emails emails or reading any blogs. But I have been meaning to re post this because it is so powerful! It reminds me that I need nothing NOTHING else than God. It reminds me of where I have come and all because of his sacrifice. I love watching this because so many of these things I myself have dealt with and to think that he cares so much about ME plain old ME that he takes on all the bullies of the world PRAISE GOD!!!Please Please comment and let me know what you think and how this clip affects you........

Very Sad

2008-10-31T01:59:00.003-04:00

We lost our Camera!!! I am very upset about this. We have looked every where and narrowed it down to a couple of weekends ago we took the kids tot he mall to hang out I took lots of really cool pics in the play area and on the Carousel then we left. That is the last time I saw it. I remember putting it in the diaper bag and have not seen it. I called the mall and it was not turned in so we are without a camera. AHHHHHH!!!

VOTE VOTE VOTE

2008-10-31T01:42:00.004-04:00

I was watching TV last night and saw this AD that the celebrities are doing that I thought was pretty good. I found it on YouTube and thought I would post it. I feel so strongly about voting and always have. I was so excited that only 9 months after turning 18 I would get to take part in my first election in 2000! I feel so honored that I can cast a vote for who I believe will be a good President of our Country and YES ONE VOTE DOES COUNT!! I have gotten in so many debates lately about how because of how our government tallies the votes one vote really does not count. This AD even if you do not agree with some of these actors watch it because it is pretty good every time I do I get chills!!!

NKOTB

2008-10-29T15:57:00.002-04:00

I just have to say that the NKOTB concert was so much fun. I was too young to go the first time and was very sad that my sister did get to go. When Lisabeth called me months back asking me if I wanted to go I was so excited. Immediately I started remember back to the days of rewinding my tapes to listen to them over and over again and watching all the videos that they made. I also remember having all the memorabilia. I had the pins,games,pillow,bedding set,dolls,every single poster made and a ton of shirts and jackets. I was in love with Joey!!

So I counted the days until the concert with many people making fun of me for going. I do have to say that the day of I got a horrible migraine and Sammy ended up getting rota virus making me almost cancel. But I sucked it up and got in the car with Anita,Lisabeth,Alexandra,Cherie,Jenny,Amy and Liz and prayed that my migraine would go away.

It was so much fun to be out but to be reliving my childhood was even better. When we first got there it was packed but once New Kids came on and the lights came on a bit at the Palace is when you really saw how many people were there. I don't think there were many seats available. And every women in there was over 24 and screaming like they were 15! It was a blast! I loved every minute of it and I have to say that they did really good for being out of the business for 15 years.

So be jealous if you did not get to go!!!

Favorite Country Music Songs

2008-10-16T21:37:00.002-04:00

It has been a long time since I have listened to country but whenever I hear a song from the past it brings me right back. I loved country! It started when I was younger and my dad would get us for the weekend he would only listen to it. Since I was searching for something that we had in common I became a huge country fan. So here are just a few (ok maybe more than a few)some of my favorites...........

My Best Friend Tim McGraw
Don't take the Girl Tim McGraw
She's My Kind of Rain Tim Mcgraw
Just to Hear You Say That You Love Me Tim McGraw Faith Hill (was one of our wedding songs)
It Matters to Me Faith Hill
Take Me as I am Faith Hill
Wild One Faith Hill
There You'll Be Faith Hill
Independence Day Martina McBride
Cowboy Take Me Away Dixie Chix
Strawberry Wine Deana Carter
Forever and Ever Amen Randy Travis
Look Heart No Hands Randy Travis (my grandpa slicker loved Randy Travis it always makes me think of him)
Thunder Rolls Garth Brooks (Nikkie I will always remember sitting at dads and playing this CD over and over and over again until we had all the songs memorized)

There are so many more so I guess I have been caught! I am a closet country music fan!

Pumpkin Pickin'

2008-10-13T08:49:00.002-04:00

Pics are to come but we had so much fun at the Westview pumpkin patch in Romeo yesterday! The weekend started great we were supposed to have dinner with some friends and 1 hour after frosting the dessert I was to bring Mariana threw up and had a fever. So we had to cancel then 1 hour later I got a migraine. Mariana was fine once the evening came but I was out until Sunday morning. We had plans to go to the pumpkin patch with Nathan's family and I refused to miss Sammy's first time. So I pushed through and I am glad I did.

Sammy had so much fun trying to lift all the heavy pumpkins and Mariana had fun picking up the small ones and throwing them :). Jordan loved playing with her cousins and picking out a pumpkin to carve with daddy. We then went and sat down in our usual spot to have cider and donuts. This is our families favorite time of year with all the beautiful colors how can you not praise God!!

Sorry Lisabeth to Copy this one was just the best one to use!!!

2008-10-08T23:32:00.001-04:00

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Mariana's Turn

2008-10-08T22:56:00.001-04:00

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Here is Jordan

2008-10-08T22:46:00.001-04:00

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Thanks Lisabeth SOOO Funny this ones for Sammy

2008-10-08T22:25:00.002-04:00

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For Nathan

2008-10-06T00:14:00.005-04:00

Since this is our family blog I guess I can let him tell me one entry to post!! We have stumbled across a show on Disney that I am sure everyone has heard of by now. Imagination Movers it is a great show but one of those really good kid shows but really annoying for adults. It is not good when you are at work and break out singing a little kids song about brushing your teeth or the days of the week!

Well a couple months back we saw a preview of this show and Nathan freaked out because a tech that he works with at SAAB who they call Red looks just like one of the characters on this show. Watch the video and it is the guy with the cowboy hat!

Thank God for Home made Crafts

2008-10-05T23:35:00.004-04:00

Today was a rough day I had no sleep at my sister's last night and Nathan had no sleep because Sam was up a lot so we were really really tired. So I was trying to find things to do that could occupy the kids with little fighting. I was reading my friend Amy's blog a couple weeks ago and she made Play dough with her son. I do not know why I have not done this myself in school we were given so many different recipes for this and I made it my self for the kids class rooms or even in the infant room. So I looked in my cupboards and sure enough I had everything but the Kool-Aid. So our Play dough was very boring looking but lots of fun. Jordan of course went right to work on a piece of Art and Mariana had fun pounding it or laying on it to see how flat it would get. Sammy would pull apart pieces and then eat it and then spit it out and repeated this at least 10 times I think he thought one piece was bound to taste good!!

Best Daddy in the World

2008-10-05T23:26:00.004-04:00

We finally got the bunk beds a couple of weeks ago and it has taken a lot of work and patience on Nathan's end to get these put together. Last night while us girls were babysitting Nolan Nathan and Sammy hung out! They went to Home Depot (Nathan loved that Sammy sat in the Nascar cart and pointed at everything and made lots of grunting noises!) to get some screws for the beds and Sammy watched Nathan put them together all night. So when we got home this morning I went into the bedroom to catch the girls faces when they saw their new bed all finished.

This is for you Jill

2008-10-05T10:39:00.003-04:00

A friend of mine who just started visiting our blog made a comment that I do not have any pictures of me on here. I do not like the camera lately I am not looking for any comments about that please. So here is one from my friend at another friends wedding recently. It is all I am going to say............

Time for my middle child to get some ATTENTION!!

2008-10-04T10:32:00.004-04:00

I felt so bad that I brought the camera for Sammy's teachers to take some pictures of him in his class and not Mariana's. So I let her bring the camera to school and take some pictures herself. I can only show one because I do not have permission to post other people's kids on my blog. She loves her class and is always talking about her friends and teacher. I love hearing all her stories about school and her adventures. She gets so excited that when her other friends are napping she gets to stay up and listen to books on tape (If she falls asleep she will be up til midnights so they help me out by keeping her up). She loves her friends Emmy and Rachel and talks about them all the time. She is learning so much already. She is counting to 20 very good and when she started she only recognized her name as May but since we started only calling her Mariana and writing it that way she recognizes that too! She also is learning so many songs and I love the way she interprets them. Like this one that goes:

This is the day

This is the day the Lord has made.

Mariana's way:

This is the day

This is the day the Lord had me!!!

I am moving

2008-10-04T10:21:00.002-04:00

Maybe some of you do not know my phobias but I hate all things that crawl,slither,wiggle,hop well anything that is not human!! I once left our house because there was a huge spider crawling around. I picked Jordan up (who was a baby at the time) without shoes and socks and ran out of the house to my mom's until Nathan got home hours later to kill it. I make Nathan spray our house at least twice a month with bug killer so I will not see anything in the corners of my house. I shake towels out when I am in am getting out of the shower so in case there is a little spider in there hiding I am not surprised.

Now that you know how deep these fears effect me you will understand why I am moving..........We have some furry friends!!!!! Not in the house (as far as we know) but lingering waiting to attack me outside. I am sorry Lisabeth I know that you care about them and captured him and let him go out in the field far away but I am different lol! I want them dead! And I do not feel guilty about it!

It started a couple of weeks ago and we thought it was just one and we caught it. Nathan saw another one two nights ago and I am freaking out! He caught another one this morning and I am going to really freak if we catch more. I know that (why am I typing in Italics??) they are outside and I should just leave them but I will not be able to sleep. I actually dreamt the other day that I woke up to a big one in my bed!! Last night I was coming in from outside and thought I heard little feet running so I started screaming and running only to learn that it was my laces on the ground lol! I guess I need to take my own advice that I give to my girls when they are scared of something.........Pray to God and he will help you with your fears!!

But I still want them GONE!!

Toliet Inspecktor

2008-10-01T08:46:00.002-04:00

Well my little man is walking and loves to get into everything. He loves going into drawers and pulling out clothes or opening and closing the DVD player and even loves to try and sit in the fridge. The latest obsession is the TOILET of all things. He is constantly running in there to play in the water. This past weekend Nathan said he was reading to the girls and he kept picking up their toys and taking off he didn't know where he was going so he decided to follow him. Sammy was getting ready to put the stack of toys in the toilet. The next night the girls were getting a bath and Sam found a bottle and put it in the toilet but this time a little girl (who shall remain anonymous) did not flush yet so you can imagine the mess.

The best is last night I got some time to myself to go to target and Nathan calls me on the cell to tell me Sammy's latest. He put Mariana's entire outfit from the day in the toilet!! Why??? What is the fascination? It reminds me of my brother who would put pencils, bars of soap, and just about anything else he could?

Hopefully it just means he will be a plumber??

International Blog

2008-09-29T22:24:00.002-04:00

It is crazy to know that people who do not know me find my blog but it is even crazier that readers from other countries have been on here reading and commenting on my crazy life stories. In the last week readers from Argentina, Brazil, United Kingdom, India,China, and Ireland! Not to mention other places around the United States! I would love to hear from some of you from other Countries and pass along a link to your blogs so I can read about your lives!! Thanks for reading!!

A New Path

2008-09-29T22:12:00.002-04:00

Back in February I left Handprints and was offered a job cleaning a women's house from Church it was such a blessing then and the schedule was perfect so that I could be with the kids and still help out in Jordan's school. I established a great relationship with Cindy and loved watching her daughter Jamie in the summer but Financially I needed to have something full time and was unsure of what to do. I started applying online like crazy I didn't care where just as long as I could find something. Then one night after a neighbor and I cleaned up the mess from our garage sales we decided to go out afterward. She invited her friend Ashley along and we went to the Great Baraboo in Sterling Heights. It was nice to get out and have some girl talk. Well not even a half hour into things Ashley starts talking about her job and Jill (my neighbor) Suggests that I would be a good fit there. So then the night turned into a mini job interview and I left there with a job interviewed scheduled. With in two weeks I had the job and started the day the kids started back to school. I was also still cleaning for Cindy on Monday and Thursday mornings and then would go to Attendant Care in the afternoon on those days. I love it! It is such a perfect fit for me I love being in an office and it gives me time to be something other than a mom and wife. Well it did get a little hard to do both. So on Thursday Ashley asked me what I would have to make in order to leave cleaning and come on full time and still be able to afford daycare. I am so excited to have gotten my first raise already and only one job. Although I will miss Cindy and the relationship we have established God is always faithful and provides things just in time. It is exciting to be making new relationships and seeing what else God has planned for the future!

I wonder if my kids need therapy part II

2008-09-29T21:41:00.002-04:00

Tonight as we waited for Nathan to put the bunk beds together the girls and I were in the living room making up stories. This is how it went:

Jordan 's Story:
"Once upon a time there was a girl and her parents took her to Disney World in Florida. She was so excited to go on all the rides and meet all the characters. Then she came home and told her friends all about it and she could not wait to go again."

and now here is Mariana's Story (BRACE YOURSELF):
One day a girl was crossing the street and she ran over a car because she was not looking and she was bleeding really bad all over the place and her parents were on bacation (Vacation) and no one could help her so she had to go to her house by herself and bleed all over the house so much that she was swimming in her blood and then her parents came home and saw all the blood!"

WHAT!!! Should I be concerned lol!!!!!!!!!!

Saab Adventure

2008-09-28T16:44:00.005-04:00

Nathan gets to bring home a different Saab almost every night of the week. Most of the time it is usually the 9 7 an SUV but this weekend was different. He got to bring home a Saab 9 3 Aero Convertible! It is so nice and I was excited to be able to be in a convertible since I never have been. I begged and begged to let me drive but he really could get in a lot of trouble (so I guess props to my husband for following the rules). I probably really embarrassed him but I took lots of pictures of my cute hubby in the driver seat! It was nice to drive just the two of us in a $50,000 car. It helped that the weather was perfect! So no one tell him that I posted these I just could not help myself :)

Slumber Party

2008-09-28T16:37:00.003-04:00

We finally sold the girls trundle bed and got them new bunk beds. So last night we had to take the beds apart so the family could get the bed today so instead of the girls sleeping on the hard wood floors we decided to have a slumber party. We put their mattresses on the living room floor and watched some shows On-Demand. Sammy loved tumbling back and forth from bed to bed. Here are some cute pics of them all!!

Say Cheese
Either best of friends or worst of enimies!!
Helping Daddy move the beds out!
She is working hard!

Busy Busy Busy

2008-09-28T16:30:00.003-04:00

Things have been pretty crazy since I started working full time. I am lucky if I get on here once a week! But I am loving it!! Here are some cute pics that I had Handprints (Sammy and Mariana's Daycare at our church) take of Sammy in his class!

Eating at the little table!

He sleeps on a cot and actually stays on it!!

Looks like he is flirting with the photographer

Eating his snack with Lilah!!

I am Forgiven

2008-09-21T15:33:00.002-04:00

Well today's service at Church was pretty intense but so worth it! I am going to let all of you know that if you already don't know some of my story and you feel that you can not be open or read this without judging leave now! I know that some of my family reads this and they do not know some things about us and would be pretty shocked. Lets remember that I am forgiven and my life is not for you to judge. I live my life for Christ now and I never judge others because I know what it feels like.

I was approached by Rick (one of our pastors) last week and asked if Nathan and I would help out with the service for this Sunday (along with about 40 other people). Celebrate Recovery was the topic actually it was how God has used Celebrate Recovery as a tool and how he has changed many of our lives. I began Celebrate Recovery one week after Mariana was born looking for healing from my past. I not only found healing but I found God! I found the real God not the one that people explained to me in my past but a loving, faithful, gracious and merciful God. I learned that all that I had been through and all that I had done was gone and I was made new. I walked around for a lot of years looking at "those" Church people and laughed at how they lived their lives and thought they are missing out on all this fun. I AM one of those people now! I love my life that is drug and Alcohol free. Some make fun of me or question me but if they saw the pain that comes from those drugs of choice then they would know why I have chosen to live my life this way. But I did not join CR for drugs or alcohol I joined for physical,sexual and emotional abuse. This was my main struggle but I soon found out that along with that came real anger and despair that I needed to give over to God. I also came to terms with some pretty horrible things that I had done in the past like being promiscuous, lying and stealing.

To get back to the reason we were asked to help out was a friend of mine was going to give her testimony and then they wanted people that have walked through CR or are going through it now to give a Cardboard Testimony. This is where on one side you write what you have struggled with and on the other side you write where you are now and what God has done to you. After my friend gave her very emotional testimony one by one close to 40 of us went up on stage and held up our cardboard's it was amazing! I am in awe of the work that God does on a daily basis. You do not have to be a murderer or a drug addict or a victim of abuse to need God and his forgiveness. You can be the man who pretends that he is perfect but goes home and drinks every night or the women who struggles with perfection or one who is very judgemental or filled with anger or is very critical. All of these things are sinful and hurting ourselves and others. I will let you know what my Cardboard said and if you want you can let me know what yours would say. And if you want feel free to call me or email me if you ever want to talk. Also come out and see what Celebrate Recovery at Rockpoointe is all about. We meet every Thursday night at 7pm and Child care is free!! Maybe I will see some one on Thursday!

I used to have:
Guilt and Shame
From
Abuse and Abortion

Now I have:
Freedom and Joy
In The
Arms of Christ

Thanks Amy

2008-09-14T00:35:00.006-04:00

Thanks to my friend Amy she recently posted a blog about a new girl friendly website called Precious Girls Club. I just was reading some of her blogs that I had not gotten a chance to and came across one where she was talking about this website for little girls! It is great a site that has games and print outs and all sort of fun things for girls.
This is great because I struggle with what is out there for my girls right now! All this Hannah Montana stuff is great (nothing against those that like it) but I am finding my four year give me attitude that I don't think I would get if she did not watch the show! So that leads to the games online they want to play. And have you ever read Junie B. Jones books? My daughter Jordan was introduced to these in Kindergarten and they are cute but I have to substitute words like: Dumb, Stupid, Idiot, and many other and these are meant for 5 years and up!! Amy was doing a give away for some books (a series of 4) from the Precious Girls Club and I am very bummed that I did not get to get in on that but I am so glad I stumbled across her blog. I have been searching for a series similar to Junie B. but faith based and have yet to find any! I am so excited I will be heading out hopefully this week to purchase them. I also registered my girls on the website and added it to my favorites. I encourage any one who knows anyone that has little girls to check this site out! And while you are at it check out Amy's blog she is always giving away really cool stuff!!

Like Mother Like Daughter

2008-09-13T20:16:00.003-04:00

When I was pregnant with Mariana and found out we were having another girl we were so excited! We played around with names not sure what to name her. We went back to the list of names that we have liked but not used with Jordan and nothing seemed right. One day I asked Nathan if we could name her Mariana Lena (my middle name is Josephine) after my Nana? He was unsure at first saying that it is weird to have a daughter named after her mother. So I begged and begged him for weeks because no other named seemed right. She already seemed like a Mariana to me. Finally he caved and my Nana could not be prouder to have another Mariana in our family. It is funny to see people's reaction when they find out that she has the same name as me.

Well all I have to say is the name fits!! She is exactly like me in every way! Her temper,her laugh, even her short little legs are like mine! The funniest was tonight when I was trying to get her to sleep I was laying by her tickling her arm (if any of my family is reading this they will crack up because I would beg everyone to tickle my back and my arm) and she started talking about her birthday! Which is in February (mine is the 6th and hers is the 9th)! She started saying that on her birthday we can go to Chuck E. Cheese and then her BIG party with her friends can be at Plaster Playhouse and then another day Nana can take her to Splash Village and then Grandma and Grandpa can take her somewhere too! There it is another reason she is my twin!

I LOVE MY BIRTHDAY the day but I make it my month! I love getting cards and messages on my birthday! I count down to my birthday and I am already hinting that a surprise 30th birthday would be nice (4 years away!!). It is so funny because she has been talking about her birthday for about a month now! I am sure that I will have more reasons why we are so much a like but I am praying that they don't all show up in her teenage years YIKES!!

Soccer Mom

2008-09-13T17:28:00.002-04:00

I am the definition of a guilty Mom! I feel absolutely horrible that Sammy has not had any professional pictures of him yet and he is 18 months old. I tried but every time I had an appointment at My Photographer we had to cancel cause Sammy was sick. I had to call the store and ask if the gift card we got a year ago could be extended so it would not expire! That aside there are many more things that create guilt in me.

One big thing is extracurricular (WHEW big word Lisabeth did I spell it right?lol) activities. Jordan has been asking for a couple years now to play Soccer and wants to do Karate and dance. Mariana says when she grows up she wants to be a Ballerina so she needs to take Ballet. There are a lot of reasons that they are not doing those things

1. It is very expensive! Soccer alone just to join is like 60-70 then you have uniforms and gas to get to games. Dance is 30 a month and costumes are like 70! My little brother teaches Karate but even with his discount it is still aver 30 a month.

2. Time
This is a big one these activities take up a lot of time! Practice sometimes twice a week and then games or recitals my head is spinning just writing about it.

3. School
I feel like right now in our kids life school is very important and that means a proper sleep which puts our kids in bed at 730 when I get out of work at 5 pick the kids up and eat dinner it is already 630! How is there time to add activities especially when you add homework to the equation.

So my problem is that everyone is always talking about their child's soccer team or dance class and I always feel guilty when heads turn to me and I say my kids are not in anything right now. I feel like I am less of a mother because I am not allowing my child to explore their creative sides! I just feel that other things are more important right now! Am I depriving my kids of exploring their creative side or am I just being practical????

You may say Luck I call it GOD

2008-09-10T21:49:00.002-04:00

In the last 24 hours some pretty cool things have happened and all I can say is God really does know the bigger picture. All day things have been happening that I have been praying for and it proves that God does provide the things that we need only when we are on our knees and praising him even in the storm! Sorry it is so short but I am really tired! BYE

Dream Vacations

2008-09-06T23:34:00.006-04:00

I love being a Mom and this time (as crazy as it is) in our lives. I love that our kids depend on us for everything right now and I love taking care of them. But I have to admit that I am excited for the day that my kids are grown and in college or out of the house and we are still young. We will be in our early 40s when our kids have graduated from high school and this is so exciting for me because we will still be young enough to date again. We never had a real dating stage in our relationship at 19 we were pregnant and married then 4 months later Jordan was born. I have all of these plans (dreams) of places to go and see maybe they will happen or maybe they won't but it is fun to dream! In no particular order......

Scotland

Alaska

Greece

Hawaii

Cancun

Italy

Ireland

Japan

Sicily

New York

Paris

India and stay at the Taj Mahal